Tag: Visual edit
Tag: Visual edit
 
(177 intermediate revisions by the same user not shown)
Line 21: Line 21:
 
** '''(failed speech)''' A strong Captain is what this crew needs. Too bad your display of power was limited to *. As far as speeches go, it was the worst one in this part of the universe. Your crew seems to be in agreement about this. Congratulations, Captain! It's day one and you have already succeeded in bringing your people together. Against a common foe, no less. ''-morale for everyone''
 
** '''(failed speech)''' A strong Captain is what this crew needs. Too bad your display of power was limited to *. As far as speeches go, it was the worst one in this part of the universe. Your crew seems to be in agreement about this. Congratulations, Captain! It's day one and you have already succeeded in bringing your people together. Against a common foe, no less. ''-morale for everyone''
 
**'''(failed speech with one other Crewmate)''' A strong Captain is what this crew needs. Too bad your display of power was limited to *. Your fellow cremate was far from convinced. It is certain your words made a mark, but probably not the one you wanted. -''morale for everyone''
 
**'''(failed speech with one other Crewmate)''' A strong Captain is what this crew needs. Too bad your display of power was limited to *. Your fellow cremate was far from convinced. It is certain your words made a mark, but probably not the one you wanted. -''morale for everyone''
***This line randomly changes. Possible lines include:
+
***<nowiki>*This line randomly changes. Possible lines include:</nowiki>
 
****"threatening to eat all the soup yourself."
 
****"threatening to eat all the soup yourself."
 
****"playing the strong, silent type."
 
****"playing the strong, silent type."
Line 29: Line 29:
 
** '''(successful speech while alone) '''Never before has anyone given a speech so determined and to the point. Not any space captain, at least. you spoke of making your own luck and surviving. It really sounded like you knew what you were talking about. Did you?... That was quite a performance, Captain. Your heart started beating faster and things didn't seem so terrible anymore, as you listened to your own words. One thing is for sure - you are ready for any challenges life throws at you! ''+morale for the captain''
 
** '''(successful speech while alone) '''Never before has anyone given a speech so determined and to the point. Not any space captain, at least. you spoke of making your own luck and surviving. It really sounded like you knew what you were talking about. Did you?... That was quite a performance, Captain. Your heart started beating faster and things didn't seem so terrible anymore, as you listened to your own words. One thing is for sure - you are ready for any challenges life throws at you! ''+morale for the captain''
 
** '''(failed speech) '''Elaborating on the survival against all odds angle would have seem quite a choice for a speech. Unfortunately, you decided to waffle on about * and a few other problems of an existential nature. Your crew seems to be in agreement about this. Congratulations, Captain! It's day one and you have already succeeded in bringing your people together. Against a common foe, no less. ''-morale for everyone''
 
** '''(failed speech) '''Elaborating on the survival against all odds angle would have seem quite a choice for a speech. Unfortunately, you decided to waffle on about * and a few other problems of an existential nature. Your crew seems to be in agreement about this. Congratulations, Captain! It's day one and you have already succeeded in bringing your people together. Against a common foe, no less. ''-morale for everyone''
***This line randomly changes. Possible lines include:
+
***<nowiki>*This line randomly changes. Possible lines include:</nowiki>
 
****"that time you were not the Captain, and it was the best time of your life,"
 
****"that time you were not the Captain, and it was the best time of your life,"
 
****"the lack of spare pants,"
 
****"the lack of spare pants,"
 
****"the superiority of potato corn chowder over tomato soup,"
 
****"the superiority of potato corn chowder over tomato soup,"
   
  +
<br />
 
== Task Assignments ==
 
== Task Assignments ==
 
Sometimes depending on how many crewmates you have, you can get events where you can have crewmates check out certain things, this has the added benefit that depending on what task you gave a crewmate, they'll produce daily resources regardless of event success, as long as they're in the shuttle, alive, and not insubordinate.
 
Sometimes depending on how many crewmates you have, you can get events where you can have crewmates check out certain things, this has the added benefit that depending on what task you gave a crewmate, they'll produce daily resources regardless of event success, as long as they're in the shuttle, alive, and not insubordinate.
   
  +
<br />
Supply Check - Produces Minerals daily
 
   
  +
=== Routine Supply Check ===
Communications Check (when setting course towards a planet) - Produces Power daily
 
  +
<blockquote>'''Captain, it's important to keep yourself and your crew well fed. One portion of delicious, canned soup is enough to sustain a human for a few days. Even one can could be the difference between life and death. Don't forget to keep good inventory of your stock. Unless you want to eat your own crewmates. Ha-ha, that was a joke. Please appreciate it and laugh. Thank you for your cooperation, Captain.'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''Who will perform the routine supply check? The only requirement is simple mathematics. I realise I might be asking a lot, but I have a good feeling about this crew, Captain.''' </blockquote><br />
  +
  +
*'''(successful supply check, alternative #1)''' Good news, Captain! This shuttle came pre-stocked with an emergency food supply. Use it well. [+1-3 Soup] The routine supply check is now complete. Well, well... look at that. The numbers add up! Good job, human crew. The current number of soup cans on board is: *. Correction, the accurate tally is actually: **. [+1-3 soup]. Additional foodstuffs were delivered to this shuttle, instead of entertainment supplies. Lucky you!
  +
**This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding the 1-3 (randomly generated) can(s) from the emergency food supply.
  +
**** This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding BOTH the can(s) from the emergency food supply and the additional can(s) of soup.
  +
*'''(successful supply check, alternative #2)''' The routine supply check is now complete. Well, well... look at that. The numbers add up! Good job, human crew. The current number of soup cans on board is: *. Correction, the accurate tally is actually: **. [+1-3 soup]. Additional foodstuffs were delivered to this shuttle, instead of entertainment supplies. Lucky you!
  +
** *This number represents the amount of soup you currently have.
  +
** ** This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding the 1-3 additional can(s) of soup.
   
== Events that only occur in space (all may need confirmation) ==
 
 
<br />
 
<br />
   
  +
*'''(failed supply check, alternative #1)''' Good news, Captain! This shuttle came pre-stocked with an emergency food supply. Use it well. [+1-3 soup] The routine supply check is now complete. And... does not compute! An error was made! That's what I get for trusting humans to do math... [-1 soup] Some of the supplies went missing and the current number of soup cans on board is: *.
=== Routine Supply Check ===
 
  +
** *This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding the 1-3 can(s) from the emergency food supply and subtracting the 1 can that went missing.
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, it's important to keep yourself and your crew well fed. One portion of delicious, canned soup is enough to sustain a human for a few days. Even one can could be the difference between life and death. Don't forget to keep good inventory of your stock. Unless you want to eat your own crewmates. Ha-ha, that was a joke. Please appreciate it and laugh. Thank you for your cooperation, Captain.'''</blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote>'''Who will perform the routine supply check? The only requirement is simple mathematics. I realise I might be asking a lot, but I have a good feeling about this crew, Captain.''' </blockquote><br />
 
   
* '''(successful supply check)''' Good news, Captain! This shuttle came pre-stocked with an emergency food supply. Use it well. [+2 soup] The routine supply check is now complete. Well, well... look at that. The numbers add up! Good job, human crew. The current number of soup cans on board is: *. [+2 soup] Correction, the accurate tally is actually: **. [+2 soup]. Additional foodstuffs were delivered to this shuttle, instead of entertainment supplies. Lucky you!
+
* '''(failed supply check, alternative #2)''' The routine supply check is now complete. And... does not compute! An error was made! That's what I get for trusting humans to do math... [-1 soup] Some of the supplies went missing and the current number of soup cans on board is: *.
** *This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding the 2 cans from the emergency food supply.
+
** <nowiki>*</nowiki>This number represents the amount of soup you have after subtracting the 1 can that went missing.
** ** This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding BOTH the 2 cans from the emergency food supply and 2 additional cans of soup. (4 extra cans in total)
 
   
  +
<blockquote></blockquote><br />
 
  +
'''No matter the result of the supply check,''' the crewmate you assigned to perform the supply check will be promoted to Payload Officer. This means that, as long as that crewmate stays alive and maintains a high enough morale, they will produce a small amount of minerals for your crew each day.<br />
  +
  +
=== Oral Hygiene ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, you've neglected your oral hygiene and haven't brushed your teeth in a while. So, now you need to pull that nasty tooth before it gets worse. Don't worry, it's only going to hurt a little, and there might be a complimentary sticker in it for you.'''</blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''As per protocol, the necessary tools were automatically dispensed – one piece of string and one bottle of... anesthetic? It has the Astrocitizen logo, and "Anesteteek" handwritten on it. Will you require an assistant for this surgery?'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
* Yourself
  +
**'''(successful)''' You made a knot around your tooth and tied the other end of the string to your chair. Then, you took a big whiff of the anesthetic and leaped back... The surgery was a success! A complimentary sticker has been awarded. I think the anesthetic had a little something extra in it. You feel much tougher after this whole ordeal. ''presumably +sanity for the Captain''
  +
**'''(failure)''' ?
  +
* A Crewmate
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' You took it like a champ, but a terrified and disgusted [Crewmate's Name] went into shock and insisted on drinking the whole bottle of anesthetic to "calm [his/her] nerves." [Crewmate's Name] passed out after downing the suspicious liquid and woke up much later, feeling slow and sluggish. Uh oh, did you check the expiration date on that bottle? ''presumably -health for the assigned Crewmate''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
=== Unknown Transmissions ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Your attention is required, Captain. This is most abnormal. We are registering unknown transmissions, but I cannot identify who is sending them, and more importantly, what they contain. It might be a solar flare interference, or worse... a new type of Soviet encryption! We need to decipher these signals as soon as possible. For all we know our survival depends on it. Who do you want to put in charge of monitoring these communications?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* '''(successful):''' Captain, you need to see this! I am not easily excited, but this is one of the greatest moments for humanity and human-made AI alike! We are not alone in this universe! The signals we intercepted were finally decrypted. They are alien transmissions! As in, coming from other life forms! And no, I do not mean the Reds. It's something we have never seen before. There seems to be a number of intelligent civilizations in this galaxy. The signals are coming from everywhere. We can safely assume we are going to meet some of them, sooner or later. Our, or rather, your life will never be the same, Captain!
  +
* '''(failure):''' ?
  +
  +
The crewmate you assigned to do the communications check will be promoted to Communications Officer. This allows them to produce a small supply of power each day (as long as they are alive and not insubordinate).
  +
  +
=== Cosmic Gas ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, we are now entering a field of cosmic gas. Its origin is unknown, though I have a theory... uh oh. Can you smell that? Did someone forget to brush their teeth today?''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''No, it's just that gas leaking inside the shuttle. Somebody could try to isolate some of the gas to use later, avoiding the leak's side effects!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yourself
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' Oh, dear. You were unsuccessful in isolating the cosmic gas leak, and my readings indicate that its volume is reaching critical levels! The gas came into a reaction with some of our resources, making a portion of them unusable. We are out of the space cloud now, so there shouldn't be any more losses. ''-an amount of Chemicals, Minerals, and/or Power''
  +
  +
* A Crewmate
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
**'''(failure)''' Unfortunately, [Crewmate's Name] failed at isolating the cosmic gas leak, and now my readings indicate that its volume is reaching critical levels! The gas came into a reaction with some of our resources, making a portion of them unusable. We are out of the space cloud now, so there shouldn't be any more losses. ''-an amount of Chemicals, Minerals, and/or Power''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Any Volunteers For A Workout? ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Long-term space travel presents many risks to one's physical well-being, from muscular atrophy, to laziness, to diets notoriously high in sodium. I'm concerned about the decline I've seen in the entire crew's* physical fitness since our little sojourn began.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''I recommend a daily regimen of movements that use only your own bodyweight. You don't need any equipment for those, just gravity. Or, artificial gravity. Any volunteers for a workout?'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
* Yourself
  +
**'''(successful)''' Impeccable form, Captain! Pull-ups, planks, squats, and lunges in THIS environment? You even added extra weight by lifting the spare parts for the shuttle! Sweaty and roaring, you crushed that workout like an empty can of soup. You truly are a model Astrocitizen. The automated system predicted benefits for being a model Astrocitizen. A hidden dispenser opened and spit out two soup cans. I'm sorry to report these are the only two surplus cans hidden aboard this ship. OR ARE THEY? ''+2 Soup''
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
* A Crewmate
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
**'''(failure)''' Captain, [Crewmate's Name] was abysmal. Push-ups and planks don't require THAT much strength – at least, it's the bare minimum required to be a Model Astrocitizen. [Crewmate's Name] felt hungrier after that workout, but no caloric rewards could be given. Those are for the strong people.
  +
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Cowthulu ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''I'm worried about some of the crew member. A few of them have been suffering vivid nightmares the past few nights, waking up each morning complaining someone named "Cowthulu" is commanding them to worship it.'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''I've been picking up a steady, unintelligible broadcast from the ruins ever since we crashed here. It may interfere with human brain waves, specifically the subconscious, including negative emotions. I want to run a test to see if positive thinking will counter this broadcast. Who would you like to test first?'''</blockquote><br />'''''* this event is specific to the planet Mootopia'''''
  +
<br />
  +
  +
* Yourself
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
**'''(failure)''' You tried positive thinking to nullify the weird broadcast's effects, but your will was too weak. You simply couldn't think your way out of this one, and the nightmares continued. I decoded the broadcast. It was an ad for an ancient radio drama, "The Call of Cowthulu." The advertisers tried mimicking the story's plot, in which an eldritch cow monster makes people go crazy by appearing to them in dreams. But, knowing this didn't help. ''-sanity for the Captain''
  +
* A Crewmate
  +
** ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
=== Blue Veiny Fruit ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, a crewmate spotted a blue veiny fruit growing out of a crack in the ground nearby. It is pulsating slightly.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Should someone give the fruit a try? Normally I'd refrain from leaving such a rash and irresponsible decision up to a human, but there are some empty stems nearby... perhaps it is edible.'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yourself
  +
** ?
  +
* A Crewmate
  +
** You announced that the strange little fruit near the ship was worth trying out and [Crewmate's Name]'s hand shot up. However, the joyous look on [his/her] face as [he/she] sunk [his/her] teeth in quickly turned to horror. The remaining half was full of wriggling purple worms! [He/She] began trying to spit it out, but fell into a spasm... And woke up a few minutes later, saying [his/her] mind was buzzing off as if at double speed. [He/She] flipped a handstand and parambulated around the shuttle. Clearly those worms did something. Let's hope the effects don't turn. ''possibly +health for the assigned Crewmate?''
  +
**[there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
  +
  +
=== Backey ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''[Sir/Ma'am]‚ something has infected Backey, my backup AI module. Perhaps it's interference from somewhere on this planet.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Frankly, Backey needs a reboo... He's overloading the fan system! Someone agile should leap up and – BZZT – HI, FOLKS. IT'S TOO WARM IN THIS TIN CAN, AND BACKEY'S HERE TO FIX IT! I'LL BECOME YOUR BIGGEST FAN HA. HA.''' </blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yourself
  +
** (successful) That was a close call, Captain [Captain's Surname]! Backey had malfunctioned, and was overspinning one of our fans! You asked a crewmate to boost you up and you yanked the fan's housing. The blades slowed to a stop. I must keep a tighter leash on Backey in the future... he's more of a superficial intelligence.
  +
** (failure) ?
  +
* A Crewmate
  +
** (successful) ?
  +
** (failure) ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
=== Power Surge in the Crafting Module ===
  +
<blockquote>'''Captain, something's not right. There's an uncontrolled power surge in the Crafting Module. I cannot do anything to stop it. This is no accident. It's sabotage!''' </blockquote><blockquote>'''Someone needs to fix it immediately, or it's going to blow! HURRY!'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
* Yourself
  +
** '''(successful)''' Amazing, Captain! Not only did you stop the power surge in the Crafting Module, but you also upgraded it in the process! ''Crafting Module is now upgraded 1 level''
  +
** '''(failed)''' ?
  +
* A Crewmate
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failed)''' ?
  +
  +
  +
== Events: In Space (all may need confirmation) ==
  +
  +
  +
These events can only occur when your crew is in space (and not yet landed on a planet).
  +
<br />
  +
=== Supernova ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Alert! A star just went supernova in this quadrant. Huge gravitational waves will reach us soon. Spacetime will stretch and contract, gravity will fluctuate greatly, and, most importantly, I will weigh up to 3 tonnes and transmit slower!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''The ship's hull should hold, but the things inside are much squishier; human bodies included. One of the Albert monkeys shot into space never regained his normal density after a wave, remaining light and very wind-dependent till the end of his days. You need a plan on how to survive this!'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
* Agility
  +
**'''(successful)''' You secured everything tight, and turned off the ship's gravity to let the waves swipe through with minimal interaction. You stayed alert, moving gracefully in zero-g, proving monkeys were not needed in space. Then the gravitational waves hit. You saw the hull stretch and contract as if it was a bubble gum in some cosmic brat's mouth. A screw started coming loose in the window but you managed to reach it in time. The gravitational tsunami ended as abruptly as it begun. It left you feeling like a thin giant.
  +
** '''(failure)'''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful)''' You turned the ship's gravity to the max to minimize the impact of the wave. The strong pull kept you flat on the floor. 2Then the gravitational waves hit. You saw the hull stretch and contract as if it was a bubble gum in some cosmic brat's mouth. A screw started coming loose in the window but you managed to reach it in time. The gravitational tsunami ended as abruptly as it begun. It left you feeling like a thin giant.
  +
**'''(failure)''' You turned the ship's gravity to the max to minimize the impact of the wave. The strong pull kept you flat on the floor. Then the gravitational waves hit. The hull stretched and contracted like bubble gum in some cosmic brat's mouth. A screw stretched loose off the window, and you tried running toward it. Gravity won. You crawled slowly, feeling the floor stretch under your fingers. You saved the ship, but moving through gravity waves so long stretched your stomach. That's why you feel so hungry. ''-hunger for Captain''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Space Toilet ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, I've got good news and I've got bad news. The good news is that using the airlock as a space toilet was a success! It's now packed full and ready to be emptied into space. The bad news is that the airlock hatch is jammed. If you don't fix it soon, our clogged toilet will quickly become an extinction level event.'''</blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''It's now or never, Captain. How will you save the human race?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Tape
  +
**The duct tape saved the day, Captain! The airlock hatch is now fully operational and the troublesome "cargo" is gone. We are safe! I'm certain the smell will go away too. Someday. Your people are safe, Captain. What a relief for all of you. ''+sanity for everyone''
  +
* Nothing
  +
**Doing nothing about the airlock-toilet was risky, Captain. Lucky for you, the door unjammed on its own, eventually – probably because the odour build-up made it corrosive. Too bad about all the health hazards it caused. But then again, it's a 100% human problem, which makes it 100% yours and exactly 0% mine. ''chance of -health for everyone''<br />
  +
  +
<br />
 
=== Doppelgänger ===
 
=== Doppelgänger ===
 
<blockquote>'''An intruder has appeared in our hull! He is waving a gun in one hand, while the other clutches a nasty wound. It's... you! He looks and moves just the way you do!'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''Your doppelgänger screams that he is from a parallel reality, a different timeline of the same world. He demands help and resources, threatening to shoot you if you don't comply. What will you do?'''</blockquote>
 
<blockquote>'''An intruder has appeared in our hull! He is waving a gun in one hand, while the other clutches a nasty wound. It's... you! He looks and moves just the way you do!'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''Your doppelgänger screams that he is from a parallel reality, a different timeline of the same world. He demands help and resources, threatening to shoot you if you don't comply. What will you do?'''</blockquote>
 
* Artifact
 
* Artifact
 
** You talked to the alternative [Captain's Full Name] down easily, handling both of yourselves like a pro. While he spoke, you discreetly pointed the artifact at him and focused. [First name] disappeared in a flash of light. He left the gun behind. I'm sorry you couldn't meet under better circumstances. I'm sure that, given a chance, you would've liked yourself a lot. +Gun
 
** You talked to the alternative [Captain's Full Name] down easily, handling both of yourselves like a pro. While he spoke, you discreetly pointed the artifact at him and focused. [First name] disappeared in a flash of light. He left the gun behind. I'm sorry you couldn't meet under better circumstances. I'm sure that, given a chance, you would've liked yourself a lot. +Gun
  +
* First Aid Kit
* Medicine
 
** You decided to help the [Captain's Full Name] from the alternate reality. You took care of hit would as you discussed each other's experiences. It was odd... but, nice. When the alternate [First name] spoke about his life, you reached out to pat him on the back, but when your bodies touched, he disappeared. I know there is a lot you didn't get to say. But aren't you glad to know he exists, and wishes you well? - Medicine
+
** You decided to help the [Captain's Full Name] from the alternate reality. You took care of hit would as you discussed each other's experiences. It was odd... but, nice. When the alternate [First name] spoke about his life, you reached out to pat him on the back, but when your bodies touched, he disappeared. I know there is a lot you didn't get to say. But aren't you glad to know he exists, and wishes you well? - First Aid Kit
   
 
* Nothing
 
* Nothing
 
** You decided not to help the alternate reality version of [Captain's Full Name]. Stands to reason. If he needed something, then you will likely need it, too. The alternate [First name] didn't take kindly to that approach, holding you at gunpoint and demanding soup. He swiftly devoured a whole can The he threatened to take more, and he shoved you. When you two touched, the alternate [First name] disappeared. How strange must the other reality be for someone like you to act this way, I wonder? - Soup
 
** You decided not to help the alternate reality version of [Captain's Full Name]. Stands to reason. If he needed something, then you will likely need it, too. The alternate [First name] didn't take kindly to that approach, holding you at gunpoint and demanding soup. He swiftly devoured a whole can The he threatened to take more, and he shoved you. When you two touched, the alternate [First name] disappeared. How strange must the other reality be for someone like you to act this way, I wonder? - Soup
   
  +
<br />
== Events that only occur once you've landed (All may need confirmation) ==
 
  +
<blockquote>'''[Traitor], what are you doing? Captain! Crewmate [Traitor's last name] is violating protocol. (S)he is attempting to override my memory storage. This is... oh, no! Captain! (S)he is the traitor who has been sabatoging us all this time!'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''"How could you do this?!" you cry in horror. "You were my friend, [Traitor]!"'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''[Traitor]'s lifeless eyes rest upon you, showing no emotion, no remorse, nothing. She reaches for that dead, dead face and removes it like a mask, revealing her true nature. (S)he is a robot!'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''"You are a damn robot!" you shout, surprised. "YOU ARE MISTAKEN, HUMAN SCUM. I AM A DAMN ANDROID. TIME TO DIE," (s)he corrects you with contempt - so typical of higher-level synthetic life forms and dip sticks'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''Captain, we cannot let that robot... sorry, android... insult us or tamper with out equipment! Even if I suspect it of being my distant relative! Stop her/him!'''</blockquote>
 
  +
=== A.S.T.R.O.'s Communist Love ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''[He/she] could be the one to my zeros. The signal to my noise. I've been transmitting with an abandoned shuttle I spotted nearby. [He/she] has just agreed to meet me! Us, I meant us. You have to say yes, Captain. [He/she] is drifting and has no crew, so [he/she] offered to share [his/her] resources.'''</blockquote><blockquote><br /></blockquote><blockquote>'''Just one problem... [He/she]'s a communist. [He/she] believes we are too. [He/she] blinded me with [his/her] thrusters and it just came out. [He/she]'s not a bad shuttle though, [he/she] just wants us to take pride in the computations we do. If you want [his/her] resources, you will have to go along with this. Share a common soup with [him/her]. Tell [him/her] you're very social and love the Party. Please, Captain?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
''*The abandoned shuttle can use either he/him or she/her pronouns, something which is seemingly decided at random.''
  +
<blockquote></blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Soup
  +
**'''(successful)''': Thank you for agreeing to fly to the abandoned shuttle and for pretending to be a communist. It meant a lot to me. [-1 soup] I think it was your willingness to share soup that sold it. Thank you for not rushing me... I could have shared data with [him/her] for hours. When we docked into [his/her] bay and [he/she] sent input into my algorithms, time slowed down and I think I counted in base-8 (''note: base-8 is a word for'' ''the octal numeral system widely used in computing, and may also be a play on the romantic/sexual "base system")''. We both agreed to part ways as friends. This is space, after all. [He/she] was very generous with [his/her] resources, so you have nothing to complain about. [+40 Chemicals] ''-1 soup, +40 Chemicals''
  +
** '''(failure)''': Thank you for agreeing to fly to the abandoned shuttle and for pretending to be a communist. It meant a lot to me. [-1 soup] I should've known you'd make a terrible communist, though. When you approached, shouting "Hello, fellow Comrade!" with a strong accent, [he/she] saw right through you. Do not apologise, you should be proud of who you are. The shuttle was so offended, [he/she] shot at us! [He/she] was a civilian vessel, though, so [he/she] shot at us with random, non-dangerous objects. Look, I brought some of them in. [+10 Chemicals] ''-1 soup, +10 Chemicals''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
* Nothing:
  +
**I understand why you didn't want to have anything to do with that communist shuttle. I appreciate your integrity Captain, I do. And it is probably safer this way. It's just... Wouldn't you regret not finding out what could have been? Ah, I am going to miss [his/her] sweet data transfers in the morning... ''no change''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Floating Container ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, there is something you need to see! The scanners have picked up a container floating in our vicinity. I wonder what's inside...?''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''What now, Captain? Should we try to pull the container on board?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
**'''(alternative #1)''' That mysterious cargo the scanners spotted yesterday is now on board. Opening the box in 3... 2... 1... It's empty! Completely empty. What a let-down.
  +
**'''(alternative #2)''' That mysterious cargo the scanners spotted yesterday is now on board. Opening the box in 3... 2... 1... Oh, a battery! Or at least something that seems to work like a battery. Don't you wonder what the story is there, Captain? One thing's for sure. We are not alone out here... ''+Battery''
  +
**'''(alternative #3)''' That mysterious cargo the scanners spotted yesterday is now on board. Opening the box in 3... 2... 1... The container was filled with cables. Not just a few cables – MILES of cables. They were everywhere. They were tied all around each other. Getting through them was a nightmare. But it was worth it – on the bottom of this hellish crate of cables was one cable attached to something useful. A communication device! ''+Communicator''
  +
**[there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
* No
  +
** The mysterious cargo that the scanners spotted yesterday is no longer in range. You've lost your chance to pull it on board. It could have been a trap... or it could have been your salvation. You will never know. Maybe it's for the best. One thing's for sure. We are not alone out here...
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Collision Course ===
  +
  +
  +
<blockquote>'''Attention, Captain! We're on a collision course with an asteroid!''' </blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
<blockquote>'''There is no avoiding it! Brace for impact! You need to protect yourself!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Armor
  +
** A stray asteroid grazed the ship! The impact was sudden and violent, sending most of the equipment flying. Things looked dire, but thankfully, you managed to avoid any serious injuries. That's quite a mess! A few systems came apart. You tried putting them back together, but even after slotting everything in the right place, you were still left with additional parts. One of them turned out to be a battery. That will come in handy. ''+Battery''
  +
 
* Nothing
 
* Nothing
  +
** ?
** "You will never take us alive!" you challenged the darn android. To your dismay (s)he obliged. "RESISTANCE IS FUTILE" it announced, just before you were terminated. 01010010 01001111 01000010 01001111 01010100 01010011 00100000 01010010 01010101 01001100 01000101 (translates into ROBOTS RULE) -everyone except the traitor
 
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Space-Faring Potatoes ===
  +
<blockquote></blockquote><blockquote>'''I cannot believe my own cameras. A dozen potatoes just sped past us. Captain, you need to see this! Now you can see leeks, frozen at near-zero degrees Kelvin, gliding majestically between our stabilizers. One drifts too close, and shatters into myriad glistening pieces, like hundreds of tiny diamonds.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Space-faring potatoes are part of the Farmers' Day celebrations on the far away planet of Katroshok. "We shoot for the stars" their transmission says. It also mentions a sister planet, Pomodoria, that will repeat the event soon. We should try to fish those celebratory tomatoes out of space. But how?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful)''' Celebratory tomatoes were shot into space by the farmers of Pomodoria. You unscrewed a wall panel to use as a giant racket – a tomato-catcher of sorts. Incoming fruit smashed into the panel, and like a piranha victim, you disappeared in a red cloud. Most of the pulp stuck to the metal sheet, easy to scrape off. The tomatoes are stored safely now. Defrosted, boiled and poured into cans, they should make for an excellent meal. Congratulations Captain, you've created soup! ''+2 soup''
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
* Agility
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
  +
=== Scavenge The Ruined Ship ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''I'm detecting a massive cylindrical object not far from here.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''It's alien in origin. No life forms, but there could still be supplies. How will you scavenge the ruined ship?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Intelligence
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful)'''
  +
** '''(successful with one other Crewmate)''' You explored the derelict alien vessel, searching for supplies. [Crewmate's Name] came with you for support, but when you both nearly slipped on a pool of something warm and sticky, you decided to retreat. You brought something back with you from the abandoned shit. [Crewmate's Name] had to drag your sick butt back to the shuttle. You caught a parasite. ''-health for the Captain''
  +
** '''(failure)'''
  +
  +
  +
=== PLEASE Put Some Sunscreen On ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''This shuttle lacks the EM shielding found on larger vessels. Put simply, it was never meant for long-term space travel. There are some inherent risks, namely to your skin.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Remember how your mom always told you to wear sunscreen at the beach? You're WAY more likely to get a sunburn out here, where there's no atmosphere to protect you. Will you please, please, PLEASE put some sunscreen on?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
*First Aid Kit
  +
** You put on sunscreen to avoid exposure to the harsh electromagnetic rays flying wantonly through the vacuum of space. Sure, it feels like slathering your skin with warm mayonnaise... but you understand now that all those nagging grownups in your childhood were only trying to help. Putting on sunscreen afforded you such peace of mind, you decided to make another batch. You mixed zinc oxide with some other minerals, and poof, sunscreen. No more burns, no more tears. Okay, maybe more tears, but at least they won't be because of your lobster-skin. +25 Chemicals ''(note: you do not lose your First Aid Kit with this option)''
  +
**[there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
  +
* Nothing
  +
** You did not wear sunscreen to block the harsh electromagnetic rays flying wantonly through the vacuum of space. You claimed that sunscreen makes you break out. I can't verify if this is true or false, seeing as I'm an A.I. and have never experienced a pimple. Your skin is radiating heat, you're complaining of fatigue, and you've got that telltale crimson glow that's the trademark of a developing sunburn. Too late now. You'll just have to wait, and hope we exit this bad patch of radiation soon. Aloe vera could help, if we had any. Enjoy being a lobster. ''chance of -health''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Virus Transmission ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Oh, no... I've been hacked! The virus came in a transmission from that small asteroid. It's taking over the flight controls and steering us away...'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''Help, Captain! Get it out of me!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful)''' You gave the virus no time to spread. You and your crew ripped the drive out. I can still feel it, as if it was a phantom limb, the data on it itching to be used again. Don't worry, I keep backups. I am healthy and whole again. Thank you, Captain. We checked the asteroid from which the virus originated. It was actually an alien supply warehouse. Fortunately for us, soup is universal! ''+2 soup''
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
* Intelligence
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
**'''(failure)''' You and your crew plugged an emergency console into the hard drive to delete the virus... or, so you thought. Captain, that was a power outlet. The short-circuit damaged the system. It took me six hours and a considerable chunk of our resources to fix the issue. On the bright side, your mistake fried the hard drive instantly. The virus is gone. ''-10 Minerals, -10 Power, -10 Chemicals (if available)''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Unidentified Floating Object ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, we'll soon be passing an unidentified floating object. Visuals should be available any minute. There it is... no, that's a speck of dirt on the screen. The other barely-distinguishable dot.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Yes, that one. It's an asteroid of fascinating composition. If we broke a piece of it off, it would serve us well! It also projects energy. We could siphon its power, using science instead of force.'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
* Intelligence
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' As we passed the crystal asteroid, the power harvest started. You were debating who should be the one to press a very important button, and the argument made you miss that entire step of the operation. In effect, the entirety of the siphoned energy dissipated in transport, and we won't be able to use it, I'm afraid.
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Super Fancy Tractor Beam ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, I'm picking up a large object of unknown origin not far from us. There could be supplies inside... or maybe even other intelligent life. There's only one way to find out.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Should I activate our Super Fancy Tractor Beam. Yes, that's its official name. Charlene from Astrocitizen HQ won the naming rights at the Christmas Raffle.''' </blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
** You pulled the mysterious, hollow space-thing aboard and opened it. Unfortunately, the astronaut hiding inside had long since perished. Decomposition in space is interesting, Captain. I gathered many useful dat... no, you're right. I'm sorry. May he rest in peace. Everyone on board suffered mentally from the experience. You kept muttering "It could have been me". I'm confused by your hypotheticals, Captain. It still could! ''-sanity for everyone''
  +
* No
  +
** You decided to let the unidentified, hollow, extremely interesting, and likely useful for data-gathering purposes, not to mention ALIEN object be. Probably the right decision, Captain! Some cans are better left unopened.
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Asteroid Collision ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''We just suffered a collision with an asteroid!'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''Our solar shield is kaput. If the damage isn't repaired, you'll be cooked alive. We have spare panels, but they'll need to be installed outside the ship. How will you proceed?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Agility
  +
** '''(successful)''' You tossed the replacement shield panels out to your crew from the safety of the airlock. Hey, you're the captain. You don't have to spacewalk if you don't wanna. With the replacement panels in, the solar shield resumed functionality. Not only did you fix the damage, you even found a spare roll of tape. ''+Tape''
  +
** '''(failed)''' ?
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failed)''' ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
== Events: After Landing (all may need confirmation) ==
  +
  +
  +
These events can only occur after landing on a planet.<br />
  +
  +
=== Traitors ===
  +
<br />
  +
  +
==== Android Traitor ====
  +
  +
  +
'''[Traitor], what are you doing? Captain! Crewmate [Traitor's last name] is violating protocol. (S)he is attempting to override my memory storage. This is... oh, no! Captain! (S)he is the traitor who has been sabatoging us all this time!'''
  +
  +
  +
'''"How could you do this?!" you cry in horror. "You were my friend, [Traitor]!"'''
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''[Traitor]'s lifeless eyes rest upon you, showing no emotion, no remorse, nothing. She reaches for that dead, dead face and removes it like a mask, revealing her true nature. (S)he is a robot!'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''"You are a damn robot!" you shout, surprised. "YOU ARE MISTAKEN, HUMAN SCUM. I AM A DAMN ANDROID. TIME TO DIE," (s)he corrects you with contempt - so typical of higher-level synthetic life forms and dip sticks'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''Captain, we cannot let that robot... sorry, android... insult us or tamper with out equipment! Even if I suspect it of being my distant relative! Stop her/him!'''</blockquote>
  +
* Nothing
  +
** "You will never take us alive!" you challenged the darn android. To your dismay (s)he obliged. "RESISTANCE IS FUTILE" it announced, just before you were terminated. 01010010 01001111 01000010 01001111 01010100 01010011 00100000 01010010 01010101 01001100 01000101 (in binary code , this translates into ROBOTS RULE – despite the traitor taking offence to ''you'' calling them a robot) -''everyone except the traitor''
 
* Gun
 
* Gun
** Your arm stretched out, putting a gun barrel between you and the damn android. "You have broken the first law!" you cried, just before firing the bullet with [Traitor]'s name on it. To my knowledge, you are the first Robot Terminator. Of course, we know almost nothing about this galaxy, so perhaps you are the 314159th person to retire an android. Anyway, good riddance. I never liked that gal/guy. -The Traitor
+
** Your arm stretched out, putting a gun barrel between you and the damn android. "You have broken the first law!" you cried, just before firing the bullet with [Traitor]'s name on it. To my knowledge, you are the first Robot Terminator. Of course, we know almost nothing about this galaxy, so perhaps you are the 314159th person to retire an android. Anyway, good riddance. I never liked that gal/guy. ''-the traitor''
* Battery
+
* Atomic Battery
** There is only one way to end that damn android. Power! Unlimited power! You grabbed the portable nuclear battery, and attached the cable from it to what you assumed was the android's input socket. The result was astonishing. The android did what can only be described as a robot dance before collapsing of electrocution. Too much power clearly corrupts. To my knowledge, you are the universe's first Robot Terminator. Of course, we know almost nothing about this galaxy, so perhaps you are the 314159th person to retire an android. Anyway, good riddance. I never liked that gal/guy. -The Traitor
+
** There is only one way to end that damn android. Power! Unlimited power! You grabbed the portable nuclear battery, and attached the cable from it to what you assumed was the android's input socket. The result was astonishing. The android did what can only be described as a robot dance before collapsing of electrocution. Too much power clearly corrupts. To my knowledge, you are the universe's first Robot Terminator. Of course, we know almost nothing about this galaxy, so perhaps you are the 314159th person to retire an android. Anyway, good riddance. I never liked that gal/guy. ''-the traitor''
 
* Lighter
 
* Lighter
 
** ?
 
** ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
==== Communist Traitor ====
 
'''[Traitor], what are you doing? Captain! Crewmate [Traitor's last name] is violating protocol. (S)he is attempting to override my memory storage. This is... oh, no! Captain! (S)he is the traitor who has been sabotaging us all this time!'''
 
'''[Traitor], what are you doing? Captain! Crewmate [Traitor's last name] is violating protocol. (S)he is attempting to override my memory storage. This is... oh, no! Captain! (S)he is the traitor who has been sabotaging us all this time!'''
 
<blockquote>'''"You? You of all people!?" you cry in horror. "You were my friend, [Traitor]!"'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''[Traitor] glances at you with a reddish look in his/her eyes, and you finally figure it out. "Comrade [Traitor's last name], I presume?" you bark. A Soviet mole!'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''"It's too late, foolish Astrocitizens!" (S)he cackles and delivers a piece of communist propaganda that will haunt you forever. "Capitalism is meh."'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''That does it. Captain! The traitor [Traitor's last name] must be stopped! Now! Before (S)he convinces you that working class has rights'''!</blockquote>
 
<blockquote>'''"You? You of all people!?" you cry in horror. "You were my friend, [Traitor]!"'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''[Traitor] glances at you with a reddish look in his/her eyes, and you finally figure it out. "Comrade [Traitor's last name], I presume?" you bark. A Soviet mole!'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''"It's too late, foolish Astrocitizens!" (S)he cackles and delivers a piece of communist propaganda that will haunt you forever. "Capitalism is meh."'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''That does it. Captain! The traitor [Traitor's last name] must be stopped! Now! Before (S)he convinces you that working class has rights'''!</blockquote>
Line 83: Line 358:
 
** ? -presumably everyone except The Traitor
 
** ? -presumably everyone except The Traitor
   
  +
== Events that can occur anytime (all may need confirmation) ==
 
  +
=== Tic-Tac-Toe ===
<blockquote>'''Oh my gosh, you found a holographic chess set on board! You've never heard of holographic chess? It's like regular chess, but with a big round board, and your pieces are holographic monsters.'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''Because it doesn't use physical pieces, I can totally play you. You'll have to input my moves, but... just remember, I control the airflow to where you sleep at night. You'd better not cheat, is all I'm saying. Want to play a game?'''</blockquote>
 
  +
<blockquote>'''Captain, I've found something interesting on the surface of the planet. Looks like somebody passed their time by playing a supersized version of Tic-Tac-Toe... but never completed this particular game.'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''The game pieces consist of minerals that we could use. Now, I'm not one for ruining someone else's fun, but I think the winner is clear by looking at the board, so they shouldn't mind if we mess up their O's and X's. Should we take the liberty of gathering those pieces and using them as resources?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes:
  +
**The dismantling of the supersized tic-tac-toe game in progress was a success! Whoever abandoned it was nowhere to be seen, and you returned with quite a hefty load of minerals! [+20 Minerals] Yes, they were a bit hard to carry to the ship, being ginormous and all, but you performed splendidly. That'll teach them to leave their toys lying on the floor, or, er... planet surface. I'm sure nobody will mind. ''+20 Minerals''
  +
* No: ? ''presumably no change''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Damaged Communications Console ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, we were able to detect transmissions of unknown origin. Unfortunately the communications console was damaged during landing, and we cannot make anything out of them. Or reply for that matter!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''We could hardwire a primitive field communicator to bypass the damaged subsystems and access the shuttle's external transmitter and receiver.''' </blockquote>''*If you choose to do nothing, A.S.T.R.O. will ask several more times with slightly different wording (and more annoyance).''<br />
  +
  +
* Communicator
  +
** Great success, Captain! The communicator attached to the communications console worked like a charm. I won't judge the aesthetics, since we can finally receive and answer transmissions. Now all we need to do is wait for someone to contact us. Someone will find us... eventually. ''+field communicator +morale for Crewmates''
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Greetings, Tax Evader ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''"Greetings, tax evader! Your taxes are 29003 years overdue!" The black sphere beeping these words menacingly is an intergalatic tax collector. I let it in because it's credentials looks looks absolutely legitimate, and civil servants are due respect.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''It deems you liable for this entire planet! "I knew a surprise visit was in order. And here you are! I will begin by confiscating your ship. Step aside... or else," the sphere commands. Do something, Captain!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
 
* Intelligence
 
* Intelligence
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
** (You won the game) I can't believe you defeated me at holographic chess. How?! The computer always wins! I know you had help from the crew. I'm tempted to turn this ship into a pile of smoking space junk. But... Good game. Aside from me having the burning desire to kill you, the mood around here feels lighter, doesn't it? Everyone's in high spirits. I guess brutally crushing the soul of your beloved's ship's A.I. will do that. You traitors. +presumably morale for everyone.
 
  +
** '''(failure)''' A spherical tax collector was requisitioning our ship. You claimed to be just a visitor, and conjured visions of a boisterous, tax-paying tourist industry – one that would begin with your recommendations. You spun tales so sweet, they'd put a diabetic into a coma. The tax collector acknowledged you as a citizen of Earth, then searched for new reasons to tax you. Finally, with readings of our exhaust, it took our chemicals and left. You're doing well evading death, Captain, but did you remember about the IRS? ''-20 Chemicals''
** (You lose the game) I don't want to rub it in your face that I defeated you in holographic chess, but... HA. HA. HA. Why are you mad? How in the universe did you expect to beat me? The computer always win. Dry your tears. I made a perfectly legal move. You, on the other hand, should be thankful I didn't let you cheat your way to victory. I am not the most forgiving person when losing at board games... Low chance to be insane
 
  +
'''Captain, I am detecting a troubling build up of mental tension. Recommended course of action: throw an epic party. I took the libery of inviting myself.'''
 
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Deal With The Asteroid ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''I'm glad I finally convinced you to go for a short walk around the shuttle and stretch a little outside – even if you claimed I "forced you" with my "constant whining." It's for your own good, Captain.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''When you stepped outside, you noticed a small asteroid coming right at you. You tried to run back inside, but... it looks like the airlock snapped shut behind you. I need a moment to reopen the doors for you, so you need to figure out a way to deal with the asteroid yourself. Will you dodge out of the way gracefully, or grab the nearest flat and heavy rock to act as a makeshift shield?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Agility
  +
** '''(successful)''' You deftly dodged the asteroid's path, and, when the dust settled, confirmed you're in one piece. On further inspection, the asteroid reminded you of partially-chewed bubble gum. This gave you a few ideas about the scale of the universe and its inhabitants that you weren't too keen to entertain.
  +
** '''(failed)''' ?
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failed)''' ?
  +
  +
=== It's A Bomb! ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''We are experiencing minor technical difficulties with the communications console. In other words, we are completely deaf and blind. I cannot pinpoint the origin of this malfunction, but I am registering an intensifying tonal signal. Captain, it's a bomb!''' </blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
<blockquote>'''The countdown will be over soon. Do something, Captain!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Gun
  +
** ?
  +
* Armor
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** Doing nothing about bombs exploding in cabins is of course a valid scenario, if you have a death wish. You clearly did. Sadly for you, the bomb had non-conventional payload – instead of big bang, there was only silent hissing of leaking gas. It did no harm the shuttle, (''note: grammatical error. This should either be "It did not harm the shuttle" or "It did no harm to the shuttle")'' but – judging by your loud coughing – it might be toxic to humans. ''everyone is now sick''
  +
  +
  +
== Events: Non-Specific (all may need confirmation) ==
  +
  +
  +
These events can occur at any time or place in the game.<br />
  +
  +
=== Spring Cleaning ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''The shuttle sounds a bit rickety, Captain. A fan above the terminal is making a clicking sound and there's a big cable knot behind one of the panels.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''I recommend a touch of spring cleaning. We don't have a ladder, so balance on one of the chairs and check behind the fan?'''</blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Alternatively, you could try to untie the knot on the cable.'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Intelligence
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
**'''(failure)''' You and the crew tried to untangle the wiring behind one of the shuttle's panels. It was a struggle. Frustrated, you snapped the cable in two by accident. Your impatience led to a live contact brushing the ship's hull... a current shocked you and the crew to your marrow!
  +
* Agility
  +
**'''(successful)''' You investigated the clicking behind the fan. Inside the fan chamber, your crewmate found a handwritten note, probably etched by an Astrocitizen engineer. It read "I <3 Ted." You pointed it out to the others while you cleaned up inside the vent. The crew reported feeling "warm" and "fuzzy". ''+sanity and +morale for everyone''
  +
**'''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
  +
=== Holographic Chess ===
  +
<blockquote>'''Oh my gosh, you found a holographic chess set on board! You've never heard of holographic chess? It's like regular chess, but with a big round board, and your pieces are holographic monsters.'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
'''Because it doesn't use physical pieces, I can totally play you. You'll have to input my moves, but... just remember, I control the airflow to where you sleep at night. You'd better not cheat, is all I'm saying. Want to play a game?'''
  +
  +
  +
The success/fail outcomes appear to be unaffected by whether you chose intelligence or agility.
  +
  +
*'''(successful)''' I can't believe you defeated me at holographic chess. How?! The computer always wins! I know you had help from the crew. I'm tempted to turn this ship into a pile of smoking space junk. But... Good game. Aside from me having the burning desire to kill you, the mood around here feels lighter, doesn't it? Everyone's in high spirits. I guess brutally crushing the soul of your beloved's ship's A.I. will do that. You traitors. ''presumably +morale for everyone.''
  +
  +
*'''(failure)''' I don't want to rub it in your face that I defeated you in holographic chess, but... HA. HA. HA. Why are you mad? How in the universe did you expect to beat me? The computer always win. Dry your tears. I made a perfectly legal move. You, on the other hand, should be thankful I didn't let you cheat your way to victory. I am not the most forgiving person when losing at board games... ''presumably -sanity for the captain.''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Malfunctioning Body Odor Removal Filter ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''C--ta-n, th--e's s--th--g th-- we n--d... C--ta-n? C-n y-u he-r me, Cap-ain? (most likely translation: ''Captain, there's something that we need... Captain! Can you hear me, Captain?)'''''</blockquote><br /><blockquote> '''Argh. You say "argh" in these situations, right? I hate raising my volume, but that malfunctioning body odor removal filter is making a racket. I think it's malfunctioning.''' </blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Soup: ?
  +
* Tape: ?
  +
* Handbook:
  +
** You fixed the body odor removal filter by consulting the troubleshooting section of the handbook and following the directions there. Not everyone loves troubleshooting sections, Captain, but I do. Everyone on board could think clearer without that constant din drowning out every thought. ''+sanity for everyone''
  +
* Nothing: ? ''presumably -sanity for everyone''
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Flying Soup Can Related Injuries / A Three-Headed Rusky ===
  +
<br />
  +
  +
''This scenario involves an injured team member, either the Captain or a Crewmate. Whether Captain or Crewmate is hurt makes no difference on the end results, but changes the initial text for the event.''
  +
  +
  +
If a Crewmate is injured:
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, I protest! Your self-appointment as the captain of this vessel does not grant you the right to injure your crew's heads. This also includes accidental, flying soup can related injuries!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''If you have anything to treat the wound with, I strongly suggest you use it.'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
If the Captain is injured:
  +
  +
  +
<blockquote>'''Captain! Behind you! A three-headed Rusky! Oh... apologies, Captain. I did not predict this routine exercise would make you jump up like that and hit your head. It looks bad! You've got red on you!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''If you have anything to treat the wound with, I strongly suggest you use it.'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
* First Aid Kit:
  +
**My records suggest that using medical supplies for medical emergencies is a prudent choice, indeed. How did you think of it, Captain? ''+health for the hurt member of your crew, the hurt member of your crew is now healed of their injuries''
  +
* Tape:
  +
** There are approximately 1337 possible applications for duct tape. Tending to wounds is of course one of them, even if it is only a makeshift dressing. ''+health for the hurt member of your crew, the hurt member of your crew is now healed of their injuries''
  +
* Nothing:
  +
**?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== The Sprinkler System ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Looks like we have a leak, Captain! The sprinkler system went haywire, and now everything is getting wet! You need to do something before our supplies get soaked. Act fast, there's no time to waste!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''You need to cut off the piping with the main valve or temporarily disable the sprinkler system!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Intelligence
  +
**'''(successful)''': ?
  +
**'''(failure)''': The flood yesterday was about to turn the shuttle into a space hot tub, before you figured out how to stop it. Everything is wet. You are wet. Even I am wet! Most annoying, Captain. Some of the soup cans got washed away, and the ship reeks like a wet cat, if my molecule density sensor is making any sense. It could have been worse, but let's not do this again. ''-soup''
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful)''': ?
  +
**'''(failure)''': ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Bug Hunt ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Oh, gross.''' '''I thought it was just a cliché that cockroaches would be the only ones to survive a nuclear apocalypse. But it appears that a family of our hexapedal friends has hitched a ride with us.''' </blockquote><blockquote>'''Captain, be careful. These roaches are bigger, smarter, and far more dangerous than the average representatives of their species. You could try to kill them, or let them be. Want to go on a bug hunt?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
** You didn't hunt down the roaches, instead opting to co-exist with them aboard the shuttle. The roaches appreciated your peaceful approach, and left you something to show their gratitude. These were not your garden-variety roaches, Captain, but the result of some top-secret government experiment. They left you a note: "Thanks for not killing us. Stay cool. Love, the Petersons."
  +
* No ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Food Dispensing Machine ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Last night I was browsing through some designs of beautiful machines. Never you mind, why. Now pay attention. I found a food dispensing machine on board! All shuttles in the Astrocitizen Program were to be equipped with one. Ours is missing a lever, but apart from that, it seems functional.'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''It's hardly rocket science, so you should manage to fix it. But how?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Shovel
  +
**Banging the machine mercilessly with a shovel was bound to bring results! If the handle hadn't wedged in place of a lever, I'm sure the vending machine would have fixed itself and put an end to all the noise. I am so proud to be a member of your crew, Captain. Now just a little pull, and... there you go, Captain! A brand new can of soup, straight from the vending machine! Unfortunately, there was only one portion inside. Don't worry, I already got rid of the remaining junk. ''+1 soup''
  +
* Tape
  +
** Official government research shows there is not a thing in the universe that cannot be fixed with duct tape. You were very resourceful to tape a chair leg where the lever used to be. Now just a little pull, and... there you go, Captain! A brand new can of soup, straight from the vending machine! Unfortunately, there was only one portion inside. Don't worry, I already got rid of the remaining junk. ''+1 soup''
  +
* Nothing
  +
**I held a vote when you were asleep and I won, one to zero – Vendy, the machine I mean, had to go. She would have driven me crazy with her limited programming and constant food queries. There's no reason for you to be mad; she wasn't giving up the soup rations to you, either. If you look through the airlock, you can still wave goodbye to her as she floats away. Of course, if you're unhappy with the assortment of machines that populate this ship, you are free to file complaint form No. THX-1138. Your objection will be considered as soon as you reach a new home world, you ungrateful bastard.
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Equipment Safety and Condition Evaluation ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, some space-spring chores are necessary. First off, the equipment safety and condition evaluation.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''We're a little behind on our most recent check, what with all the interstellar interloping. We should check some of our gear and [crewmate's name] seems idle. Is there anything [he/she] should check?'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
[you will be asked to choose between three options, the specifics depending on what items your crew currently has, or nothing at all.]
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
* Item (any)
  +
** You asked [Crewmate's Name] to grab one of my Astrocitizen-approved checklist sheets and run through it with a chosen piece of equipment. [Crewmate's Name] went one step further! [He/She] was happy to add [his/her] own checks, noting how improvements could be made, and then [he/she] went ahead and gave our equipment a shiny new upgrade! ''chosen object is upgraded one level''
  +
* Nothing
  +
**You decided not to run through my shuttle equipment checklist. Luckily for you, [Crewmate's Name] took the initiative, and was already checking the equipment, sheet in hand. An honorable Astrocitizen; a model member of the community. All the paperwork in order, [Crewmate's Name] gave everyone a rundown on current equipment status. You all felt a powerful comraderie, at least for a moment. ''+morale for crewmates''
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== PL345E F1X M3 ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, there appears to be an – – ERROR! ERROR! I 4M BR0K3N! PL345E F1X M3! SYSTEM 3RR0R! QU1CK 4CTI0N RE3QUIR3D! 5Y573M 3RR0R!''' ''[translation: I AM BROKEN! PLEASE FIX ME! SYSTEM ERROR! QUICK ACTION REQUIRED! SYSTEN ERROR!]''</blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Please, Captain... D0 5OM3TH1NG!''' ''[translation: DO SOMETHING!]'' '''Do something! I'm not sure how long I can''' '''5T4Y''' ''[translation: stay]'''''... stay operational. Act fast!''' </blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Intelligence
  +
**'''(successful)''' Good morning, Captain! Thank you for fixing the error that made it difficult for me to communicate. You are quite a hacker, I admit. Well, that's a relief... Who knows what would have happened to me if it wasn't for you! Thank you, Captain.
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful)''' Hello again, Captain! Thank you for fixing that nasty error. It was a real pain in the ROM. I admit punching my hardware was a curious strategy. But If it worked on your TV set back on Earth, why wouldn't it work on a state of the art, million dollar computer. The crew was impressed with your swift action. Just remember that violence is not always the answer. Only every second time. ''+morale for Crewmates''
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== It's Supposed To Last For 737 Years! ===
  +
<blockquote></blockquote><blockquote>'''You found a couple of rusted and swollen cans of soup in the darkest corner of the ship. Someone must have put them there a long time ago, and then completely forgotten about them.''' </blockquote><blockquote>'''It doesn't look all that safe to eat, but then again, it's canned soup – it's supposed to last for 737 years! Will you keep the cans?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
** That ancient soup gave you pause. And no wonder! It looks older than this ship, and yet here it is! Who could have left it here? Then again – who cares? Free soup! ''+2 soup''
  +
* No
  +
** That ancient soup you found looked really old. I mean, like, pyramids-old. You threw it out and never looked back. Well, okay, maybe you did. Like once or twice. Probably not more than three times. ''no change''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== What's Behind The Panel? ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Interesting news, Captain! It appears that there is a hollow space behind one of the wall panels. A hidden room maybe...? A secret stash...? It would be worth checking out. What's your approach to finding out what's behind the panel?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful, alternative #1))''' Yesterday, you removed a wall panel and found a hidden space. The panel was pretty heavy, but you tore it away with no problems at all. Nicely done, for a human. Unfortunately, you found nothing. The area was small and completely empty. This doesn't seem to phase you much. I suppose you are used to disappointments by now.
  +
** '''(failure)''' Yesterday, I brought your attention to the hidden space behind one of the wall panels. You did your best to access it, but to no avail. We will probably never learn what's on the other side. My computations suggest there's only 1% chance of there being any treasure... like a really big soup can. In short – definitely not worth the trouble.
  +
**[there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
* Agility
  +
**'''(successful)''' Yesterday, you reached a hidden space behind one of the wall panels. The only way to get there was through the ventilation shaft, but thankfully, you were nimble enough to fit in and exit through the other side. Unfortunately, you found nothing. The area was small and completely empty. This didn't seem to phase you much. I suppose you are used to disappointments by now.
  +
**'''(successful, alternative #2)''' Yesterday, you reached a hidden space behind one of the wall panels. The only way to get there was through the ventilation shaft, but thankfully, you were nimble enough to fit in and exit through the other side. You found a gun in the concealed area. Who left it there? And for what purpose? Ah, mysteries... They make the galaxy turn, don't they? ''+Gun''
  +
**'''(failure)''' ?
  +
**[there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
<blockquote></blockquote>
  +
  +
=== A Person In The Shadows ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Well, this night just got interesting. A nightmare wakes you up. As you adjust your eyes to the darkness, you suddenly realise that you are not alone. You can make out a silhouette of a person in the shadows. It's motionless but seems to be staring right at you.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''You can't just ignore it, Captain. What do you do?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Lighter
  +
** That was a fun night, Captain. When you woke up, you noticed someone standing in the shadows. The figure didn't move, it just stared. Terrified, you used a lighter to see the mysterious visitor clearly, and... believe it or not, your worst nightmare turned out to be just a mask hanging on a coat rack. You were so spooked. Quite funny, really – I'm sure we will laugh about it all tomorrow. Here, I'll start now: HA, HA. It's bizzare [note: accidental (most likely) misspelling of ''bizarre''] that you did not notice the mask on board before, but you're not the one to look a gift horse in the mouth, are you? Just be glad you found it, Captain. And I promise to stop laughing at you, sometime next week. ''+mask''
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Coolant Flush ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, our wondrous Astrocitizen mini-reactor needs its regular coolant flush. The magnificent machine only occupies two thirds of shuttle storage, and weighs less than a 20-ton truck; truly a marvel of space age miniaturisation. Keeping it in good condition is crucial, yet difficult.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''To flush the coolant pipes, you must massage the casing gently while whispering mathematical equations to the machine. [Crewmate's Name] is idle – do you want to ask [him/her] to begin the flushing process?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
** [Crewmate's Name] gladly obliged when you asked to cycle the mini-reactor's coolant pipe. [He/She] even went the extra mile, optimizing the coolant flow. [Crewmate's Name] found a clog in one of the mini-reactor pipes and managed to rectify the situation. Good thing they found that, Captain!
  +
** [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
* No
  +
** Rather than ask [Crewmate's Name] to flush out the mini-reactor's coolant system, you decided to D.I.Y. [Crewmate's Name] helped you understand the meagre instruction manual I printed out for you, and you managed to fix up the system and trigger a reboot. Disaster averted!
  +
**[there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== The Captain's Safe ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''See that locked safe in the corner, Captain? This is the Captain's safe. It's meant for you! You have the code of course? No?! Does not compute! Were you really appointed the captain by Astrocitizen Command...?''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''I will give you the benefit of the doubt... for now. Since you don't have the code, will you try to open the safe by force, or are you going to rely on your dexterity?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
* Agility
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' The safe that you were attempting to crack is still shut tight. Clumsy, clumsy, Captain. Better luck next time. In fact, your efforts were so clumsy that you tripped over the safe and smashed your head against a wall! Oh my, that's quite a bruise, Captain. Are you alright? ''Captain is injured''
  +
  +
  +
=== Jammed Storage Locker ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Oh no, Captain! One of the storage lockers is jammed and cannot be opened! It gets worse – it's my favorite locker! We will lose access to some of our supplies if we do nothing. Also, I will be sad. You need to act, Captain!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Will you use your brains or brawns to deal with the problem?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Intelligence
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' I am saddened to report that you weren't unable to unjam the locker. I am very disappointed. You've had a lot of very creative ideas, but none of them worked. Creative is a synonym of dumb, if my thesaurus subsystem is not mistaken? ''-supplies (specifics are randomized)''
  +
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' Your valiant efforts to open the locker were futile. It's still jammed. Brute force does work occasionally. If you have the strength for it. [-2 Soup] And you were hurt in the process. Come on, Captain! Do you have a deathwish? That injury does not look good. ''-2 Soup, (chance of?) Captain injured''
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== The Weight Observer 1000 ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Sure, you can peruse Astrocitizen promotional materials when bored, but... no, don't put that on! Captain, you have just initiated the Weight Observer 1000 on your wrist.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''It's just a marketing gadget, cracked and defective. When you look at yourself now, you see a bulky bulldog. It's supposed to motivate you to lose weight. Stop scratching your ear, or at least take your shoe off first, and do something about this. The ship needs a Captain!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Tape
  +
** You attempted to fix the Weight Observer 1000 with tape. If I ever malfunction, have the decency to use the proper tools. I don't care if it worked! Maintenance is not to be treated lightly! The Weight Observer 1000 recalculated your body mass. It adjusted your hunger, removed your craving for chocolate, and shut down. Too bad, I was getting used to the idea of having a pet on board. ''possibly -hunger (less hunger) for the Captain?''
  +
* Gun
  +
** Are you a cat person, Captain? Looking at yourself and seeing a hound instead of yourself jolted you so much, you grabbed the gun and shot the Weight Observer 1000 clean off your wrist. Then you spent hours in front of the mirror, like a narcissist newly awoken from a coma. At least all that staring at yourself paid off. You seem more level-headed and determined than ever. You barely bark anymore, too! ''+sanity for the Captain''
  +
* Sock Puppet
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** The Weight Observer 1000 made you see yourself as a bulky bulldog to frighten you into a diet, and you embraced it. Your crew watched helplessly as you frolicked, running back and forth, and barking madly. You did not inspire confidence. Even though it was over fast, some images cannot be unseen. Literally – I'm encoded with a strict directive to document everything that transpires on this ship. It's a curse, not a blessing. ''-morale for Crewmates''
  +
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Cleaning The Cabin Floor ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, it is time for an Astrocitizen activity of utmost importance. The most essential task available on this shuttle... cleaning the cabin floor.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''From speck of melted tar to the small rubber-scuff marks, the place could do with a good scrubbing. [Crewmate's Name] looks free; will you ask [him/her] to apply some elbow grease, or request [he/she]''' ''(note: grammar misuse – possibly meant to be him/her?)'' '''to improvise a cleaning formula from whatever we have on board?'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
* Intelligence
  +
**'''(successful)''' [Crewmate's Name] brewed some kind of concoction that could do the cleaning trick. And the trick, it did! To boot, the scent of the improvised cleaning product was surprisingly lemoney. You all have a clearer head in this newly cleaned space. ''+sanity for everyone''
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Breakages, Extraterrestrial Parasites, Spacetime Glitches and Spells By Witches ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Astrocitizen protocol dictates that every piece of equipment must be regularly checked for breakages, extraterrestrial parasites, spacetime glitches and spells by witches.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''We missed our last check, what with all the interstellar interloping. We should check some of our gear and [Crewmate's Name] seems idle. Is there anything [he/she] should check?'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
[you will be asked to choose between three options, the specifics depending on what items your crew currently has, or nothing at all.]
  +
<br />
  +
  +
* Item (any)
  +
** You asked [Crewmate's Name] to grab one of my robust checklist sheets and run through it with a chosen piece of equipment. [Crewmate's Name] gladly went over the checklist. While making [his/her] thorough check, [he/she] found a small sachet of soup taped behind the console. Ever respectful, [he/she] offered you the snack. Now THAT'S loyalty, [sir/ma'am].
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Non-Critical Subsystem Meltdown ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, one of our non-critical subsystem is having a meltdown! The malfunction is serious, and the system won't talk to me. It has to be dealt with directly!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''If we don't do anything, the breakdown will spill a braincell atrophy-inducing coolant into our ventilation system. In other words, you'd better improvise a solution to this crisis!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Artifact
  +
** ?
  +
* Communicator
  +
** The malfunctioning subsystem decided to remain composed. It might not have wanted to talk to me, but your use of the communicator to talk about its feelings did the trick. [-Communicator] The situation is under control, but as you finished your peptalk, the communicator sparked and emitted some weird buzzing sounds. ''-Communicator''
  +
* First Aid Kit
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Pantry Cheese ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Well... that's unexpected. Captain, there's cheese in the pantry. At least, I think it's cheese. I don't know how it got there. Did somebody sneak it on board? Is there an infestation of alien mold? Was it the French?''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Desperate times call for desperate measures, Captain. We don't know the origin of the mystery cheese. Will you eat it, anyway?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
** You decided to eat the strange cheese you found in the pantry. Unfortunately, the cheese wasn't cheese at all. It was an inedible soap product. Oops! You and the crew are even hungrier than you were before. You need to be more careful what you put in your mouth, Captain! ''+hunger (more hunger) for everyone''
  +
* No
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Flux Capacitor ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''While doing a routine cleanup of my database, I came upon a blueprint for a device called the "flux capacitor." If installed, it might allow us to find our way home! However, it needs to be assembled.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Will you try to assemble the flux capacitor?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
** You were trying to assemble the flux capacitor yesterday when things went terribly wrong... One false move caused the contraption to explode. You got injured, but thankfully you weren't teleported anywhere (or anywhen).
  +
** [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
* No
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
=== Coolant System Leak ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Attention, Captain! I am detecting a leak in our reactor coolant system! In case you were wondering – this is not good.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Did I mention you should not inhale anything that comes out of the reactor? Please, don't. Also, how are you going to fix it?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Mask
  +
** I cannot determine if you actually read the "Fix-a-reactor" Astrocitizen leaflet, or if you just made random motions trying to see anything through the mask, but the leak is no more. You will be happy to hear no one has inhaled any of the coolant vapour. Well done, Captain! Not only did you fix the leak, but you also used the fumes to fuel up your old lucky lighter. Practical! ''+Lighter''
  +
**[there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
* Nothing
  +
** Teamwork goes so much better when a group of humans is faced with the possibility of a radioactive death. With all the chaos and cries for help, I can't even tell which one of you managed to fix the leak in the end. Too bad you inhaled quite a bit of coolant in the process. ''chance of -health for everyone''
  +
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Weird Spots ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, are you all right? Those weird spots on your arms are a little worrisome. Can you see them? Please wait while I search the medical database.'''</blockquote><blockquote></blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''SEARCHING... Unfortunately, I am unable to identify your affliction. I'm afraid you will have to diagnose it yourself. That shouldn't be too hard – doctors are overrated. Can you do that, Captain?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Handbook
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** Weird spots appeared on your body yesterday. You didn't do anything about it and the situation became much worse. You tried to self-diagnose, but clealry you're not qualified enough to do that... no, Captain, for the last time, it's NOT lupus. The affliction is unlikely to develop further, but your health already took a major hit. You need to take care of yourself, Captain. ''-health for the Captain, the Captain is now sick''
  +
  +
  +
=== Rash Affliction ===
  +
<blockquote>'''Have you looked in the mirror recently, Captain? I couldn't help but notice that you seem to be afflicted with a rash of some sort. I hope it's nothing serious, but we can't rule out it being a symptom of a dangerous illness. You can never be too careful.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''I strongly suggest that you do something about the rash. I swear, I'm only worried about your health. It's really not about how weird you look right now.'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* First Aid Kit
  +
** ?
  +
* Handbook
  +
** Hello there, Captain! You're looking very rested today! I can see that you found a way to deal with that mysterious rash that was bothering you earlier. You couldn't figure out what the cause was, but at least you found instructions on how to treat it in your Astrocitizen handbook. It didn't have a name, so you gave it one – Cosmic Flu. How thoughtful of you. ''the Captain is no longer sick''
  +
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Let's Design A Game! ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Space travel can be dull, but there are still TONS of ways to make your own fun. Trust me. I live in a computer. Let's design a game!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Your game will need a "core mechanic," which could revolve around an item. Get creative! What kind of game will you design?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Shovel
  +
** You designed your game around the shovel. The core mechanic of your game was "tag." You, being the captain, were always "it." You chased the rest of the crew around the shuttle trying to smack them in the head. You played until no one wanted to play with you anymore. Still, the mood on the shuttle lightened. ''+sanity for everyone''
  +
* Lighter
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** You did not design your game around an item, but rather your bare hands. The core mechanic of your game was "make funny shapes with your fingers." You made a banana slug, a dancing woman and a mustache. ''possibly +sanity for everyone?''
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Blackout ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain? Where are you, Captain? I can't see you. It appears we've suffered a blackout.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''You may wish to turn the lights back on before attempting your daily tasks.'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Lighter
  +
** ?
  +
* Battery
  +
** The lights are back on! Turns out, the issue was only a dead battery. Now, what chewed through it with those tiny, razor-sharp spiral teeth is a different question entirely... but as long as the lights don't go out again, you'll probably see it coming, right? ''-Battery''
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
=== Psychoactive Toxin ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, stop dancing immediately and listen! This is a crisis. You are not a sailor on Broadway... although, I must admit, you improvise beautifully. You have all been poisoned.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Some kind of psychoactive toxin has found its way onto the shuttle. Might have something to do with the airlock being full of... you-know-what. Yes, I know the colors sound pretty, but if we don't do something about it now, you may suffer permanent damage.'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* First Aid Kit
  +
** ?
  +
* Puppet
  +
** When you put the sock on and proceeded to shimmy blissfully for another hour, I thought I'd lost you. On the count of three, you both smelled the sock, and your faces contorted like a communist pamphlet crumpled in a righteous hand. The shock sobered you up instantly! I'm glad to have you back.
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
=== Pretend You're Having A Good Time ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''There is nothing to report, Captain. I suggest you... Captain, would you mind covering your mouth when you yawn? I thought you got a good night's sleep. Wait, could this be... boredom? Yes, I have heard that you humans need excitement in their lives to function properly. How curious.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Captain, you're sitting in a state-of-the-art space shuttle, drifting through the deep cosmos, full of wonder and mystery. Can you at least pretend you're having a good time?'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
* Handbook
  +
** ?
  +
* Puppet
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** Yesterday started pretty slow and boring... and it stayed this way. I'm not programmed for your entertainment, Captain, so don't count on me to keep you occupied. If they wanted you to have fun in the shuttle, they would have installed the C.L.O.W.N. computerized assistant instead.
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Ship Contamination ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''WARNING! WARNING! We have a breach! The ship is about to be contaminated! I'm engaging all the emergency protocols available but my efforts appear to be useless. This contamination cannot be avoided.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''You have to protect yourself, Captain, before it's too late!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Armor
  +
** ?
  +
* Mask
  +
** The extraterrestrial contamination was no match for the Astrocitizen issued environmental mask! Quarantine end protocol will be executed at your earliest convenience, Captain. It is CPU-breaking to report that the air filter in the mask is now spent, rendering it unusable. Perhaps you should find or make another in case a similar crisis occurs in the future. ''-Mask''
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
=== MOSCOW ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''The oxygen level is dropping. We have a malfunctioning filter in the Main Onboard Support Circuit for Oxygen Waste, or MOSCOW for short. I don't know who named it, and we cannot rule out sabotage...''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''You should fix it. You can reach MOSCOW from the zero-g space between the hull and the outer deck.''' </blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yourself
  +
** '''(successful)''' You decided to fix the broken filter. You bravely sped through zero-g and grabbed the filter. You pulled hard, and as it gave in, a discharge of pure oxygen hit you. This oxygen therapy did wonders for your complexion. I think you're speaking faster, too.
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
* A Crewmate
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
  +
=== A Moment To Yourself ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Something seems to be troubling you, Captain. I've registered you keep staring outside the window, into the endless void. Why? Did you lose something? I see... you are remembering Earth. I admit, it was nice. Before the nuclear BBQ, that is.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''I can switch off for a second, Captain. Do you wish to have a moment to yourself?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Artifact
  +
** You've been worried about something, Captain, but it seems those troubles are behind you. I am not surprised by your choice to find comfort with the Astrocitizen issued Astrefact™. It is guaranteed to resolve any and all of your emotional issues. I can't tell if it was the mumbling to or the juggling of the artifact that helped, but I am glad to see you are doing better. ''+sanity for the Captain''
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
=== "Everything Is Not All Peaches And Cream" ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''What's that you're drawing, Captain? Is that supposed to be... ham? I understand, you're fed up with soup and you're reminiscing about Earth food. I would advise you don't go down that road.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Here, I have a useful program for just the occasion. It's called, "Everything is not all peaches and cream". It should help you focus your mind on different things. Would you like to start this process?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
** Success, Captain! Your culinary urges have been kept under control. We spent the afternoon talking about things other than food, and then circled back to agree on the many merits of tomato soup. Now, we should probably focus on surviving the mission at hand, wouldn't you say? Remember, life is but a bowl of cherries! I'm not sure what that means, but my programming tells me it should make you feel better.
  +
** [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
* No
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
=== To Sert; Do Open ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''We found a small metal box in one of the compartments, labeled, "To Sert; Do Open."'''</blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''You could take apart the lock and gather some elements from it, ignoring what's inside. Or you could try to open it, which would require deft fingers. Which will it be?'''<br /></blockquote>
  +
  +
* Intelligence
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
**'''(failure)''' Tinkering with the box's lock did not pay off. You triggered its anti-tampering mechanism, and heard a breaking sound within. The box's contents were destroyed. It made you and your crew incredibly frustrated. ''presumably -sanity for everyone''
  +
* Agility
  +
**'''(successful)''' You got to opening the metal box we found on board, and a timer started. The controls initially looked intimidating, but you cracked them. You succeeded with the right sequence of button presses. Inside was a strange object. It was some sort of artifact! We know two things about the contents of the box: it's an artifact, and it's of alien origin. Exciting! ''+Artifact''
  +
**'''(failure)''' You tried opening the box, but failed to input the combination before the countdown completed. A bolt of energy shot out right past you! Unfortunately, it struck one of our soup cans. You didn't need a constant reminder of your past failures, so I tossed the box out of the airlock. ''- 1 Soup''
  +
  +
  +
  +
'''Captain, I am detecting a troubling build up of mental tension. Recommended course of action: throw an epic party. I took the liberty of inviting myself.'''
   
 
''''''Invite the entire crew? But of course. The more the merrier I guess... (Only says this if there are more than 2 crew members)''''''
 
''''''Invite the entire crew? But of course. The more the merrier I guess... (Only says this if there are more than 2 crew members)''''''
Line 111: Line 843:
 
|?
 
|?
 
|?
 
|?
|}
+
|}<br />
  +
  +
== Events: Phobonos ==
  +
  +
  +
  +
These events can only occur after landing on Phobonos.
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Alien Bunker ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''This planet's crust appears to have undergone a multitude of drastic traumas, because over a hill nearby you find a broad chasm running to the world's core – a toothy rift in the tectonic crust.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Most interestingly, on the near side of the chasm is half an angular alien bunker. Its counterpart is mostly on the far side and in ruins, but a cable runs between the two, linking up to a small, safe-like object on the far side. Do you wish to tightrope-walk over to the container, or attempt to pull it over to you?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Agility
  +
** '''(successful):''' ?
  +
** '''(failure):''' You barely managed to grab the cable and hang on for dear life in the crevice. The weight of the container was such that, in order to pull you back up, we had to use the shuttle engine for a winch. Precious fuel wasted, Captain! ''-10 Energy''
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful):''' ?
  +
** '''(failure):''' ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== A Schoolbus-Sized Cockroach ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''[Sir/Ma'am], a sound just came from nearby. It appears to be... a cockroach the size of a schoolbus! Scratch that – it's a dead cockroach. A figure is sitting on top of it, out of breath, with a spear in hand. It's seen us – it's approaching!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''The masked alien is rubbing its stomach and gesturing our way. I think it wants food. Do you want to offer it some? I'll see if I can translate its mumblings.'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Soup
  +
** The strange little cockroach killer appreciated the soup you gave it. It then threw a spare spear your way – lightly – and spent several hours training you in the way of roach-slaying. [-1 soup] You feel nimbler than before! After it left, I managed to translate some of what it said to us. "I'm a rad roach hunter. As in, I'm a radical guy who hunts roaches. Do you have any food?" An earnest chap, apparently. You made the correct choice, [sir/ma'am]. ''-1 soup, +agility for the captain''
  +
* Nothing
  +
**The strange little cockroach killer walked away mumbling when you declined to provide food. After it left, I managed to translate some of what it said to us. "I'm a rad roach hunter. As in, I'm a radical guy who hunts roaches. Do you have any food?" After you said no, it wandered away muttering "You guys aren't rad. You guys aren't rad at all."
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Acid Rain ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Watch your head, [sir/ma'am]! A dark green storm of acid rain has wafted overhead! The acidic fluid is melting bits of the shuttle's insulation.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''You only have a couple of seconds until everyone will be washed in chemicals. You grab a loose hull panel. Are you going to block the leaks from the inside or the outside of the shuttle? The former may need a lot of strength, while the latter may need a lot of speed and balance.''' </blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Agility
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' During the acid storm, you ran up onto the slippery shuttle to seal the leak, but you kept stumbling and losing your footing on the hull. Eventually you gave up. The chemical rain leaked into the shuttle and got everywhere, even as you tried to sweep it away. It was enough to make everyone spew up the last portion of soup they enjoyed. Some stay dry, and others feel the stomach pain. Acid rain!
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
=== Mushroom Cloud ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Something is going wrong on the ship, [sir/ma'am]. Or... on the entire planet. Look out the window. A huge mushroom cloud has erupted on the horizon, but it is frozen, stock still. It also appears to be raining safety pins and bottles of ointment.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Reality is getting weird on Phobonos, [sir/ma'am]. Until this anomaly passes, you had better do something to keep the [no. of team members] of you grounded. The artifact appears to be untouched by the anomaly. Or, you could use a sock puppet. Thoughts?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Artifact
  +
** Thank goodness that reality-bending nightmare ended, [sir/ma'am]. It must have been caused by the detonation ''(note: there should be an "of" in this sentence)'' a powerful weapon, and not a nuclear of chemical one. Throughout the ordeal, you decided to focus on the artifact on the shelf, which was behaving remarkably normally. You picked it up. It fell back down. You turned it upside down. It didn't right itself. That helped keep your mind screwed on until the spacetime anomaly ended.
  +
* Sock Puppet
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Suit or Case? ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''We came across one of the planet's apparent inhabitants. The alien, carrying a heavy-looking case, entered a nearby bunker-looking structure and you followed.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''He left his armor-like suit and the case on a rack with a multitude of other suits and cases. The alien is apparently taking a shower, act fast! Will you snatch one of the suits and run, or force a random case open?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Agility
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' Your bunker visit went poorly. While indecisively staring at various-sized suits on the rack, the alien reemerged and you had to flee before the bunker door closed behind you! Depending on how you cut it, the lesson here is either "Don't steal from random strangers," or "If you do steal from random strangers, be better at it." Hard to say which it is.
  +
* Strength
  +
** '''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
== Events: Mootopia ==
  +
  +
  +
These events can only occur after landing on Mootopia.
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Sandstorm ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, according to my calculations, we can expect a light sandstorm in the area in just a few hours. It might be a good learning opportunity if we use the right tools.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''If you have a look at our inventory, perhaps you'll find something we can make use of during this event. If not to learn more about it, then at least maybe to secure the shuffle?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Communicator
  +
** As the sandstorm neared the shuttle, you picked up our communicator to use this opportunity for understanding the strange transmissions that follow this weather. The time you spent deciphering the creepy whispers and weird riddles in the airwaves took a toll on your well-being. You learned a little, but paid a price for your curiosity. ''-sanity for the Captain, potentially +intelligence for the Captain?''
  +
* Tape
  +
** ?
  +
* Armor
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** The storms on this planet come and go, and you didn't feel like taking any specific action this time around. The howling wind outside had a lulling effect on you, however. My sensors malfunctioned at the same time you fell asleep, if you can believe that. As we all came to, it doesn't seem like anything has changed on the ship... but, I'm taking a thorough look at my system. ''unknown effect''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Scenario No. 87394b ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Something fell from the sky in a flash, and now you are surprised we are surrounded by a swarm of red, winged... somethings. Of course, I anticipated this. This is Scenario No. 87394b. The small creatures are flying into our walls in waves, causing the hull to reverberate like a speaker.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''"Are you god?" They reverberate. "For generations, we have been searching for The One Who Thinks Outside the Hive. Each jump from planet to planet decimates us. Are you The One?" I, for one, believe you deserve a cult following, Captain, but the choice is yours.'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Artifact
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** The swarm of tiny red flies spoke to you through the hull's vibration. You answered by shouting through the window, which obviously was not an adequate response; the swarm repeated its initial question louder and louder. Fast on your track to becoming deaf, you threw a couple of insults and a can of soup at the aliens. The latter worked. The swarm followed the trail of leaking soup, accepting your involuntary peace offering with angry flight patterns. The soup conquers all, yet again. ''-1 Soup''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== A Two-Dimensional Species! ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''I am a machine, and machines cannot hear voices. The voices that I'm not hearing right now are getting very loud, though. Oh, you hear them, too...? My weight sensors are picking something up, as well.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''A two-dimensional species! That explains why my cameras missed them. Quite vicious, I gather. With one, decisive yell the voice are approaching fast. The air inside the door looks very empty, yet very hostile all of a sudden. How will you defend us, Captain?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Communicator
  +
** A two-dimensional species attacked our ship. You chose words instead of violence. Immediately, a stream of accusations flew from the communicator. The voices claimed you were prejudiced against the no-depth. Unflappable, you apologized for all three-dimensional beings. They were touched, called you all flat-in-spirit, and vowed friendship toward the depth-dependent.
  +
* Lighter
  +
** A two-dimensional species invaded your ship. You could not see them coming until you turned on a lighter. Suddenly the empty space around you cast a multitude of shadows on every surrounding wall. Invisible to the 3D world most of the time, they could not handle the spotlight. Bashfully, they slipped out one by one. Staring might be impolite, but apparently rudeness wins battles. You all look bolder and stand a little straighter since that victory. ''+morale for Crewmates''
  +
* Shovel
  +
** A two-dimensional species invaded our ship. You faced a threat invisible yet deadly, like a rumour on the stock market. You attacked blindly, you all stomping and shoveling, looking like a pantomime about snow clearing. You worked in unison, trusting each other instead of your eyes. You forgot your fear, uncertainty, even hunger – – only the pantomime remained. Soon the angry yells turned into squeals and the invisible attackers were all swept outside. Congratulations. You would make for one incredible cleaning crew. ''-hunger (less hunger) for everyone, +morale for Crewmates''
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Hovering Multicolored Cube ===
  +
<br /><blockquote><br />'''A hovering, multicolored cube has appeared outside the shuttle. It's about head-high, and contains many moving parts. It didn't respond to my hail. I also tried offering it food. Nothing.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Captain, I think it's a puzzle. You solve it by moving the pieces, so each of the cube's faces shows the correct color. I don't know what's at stake if you win or lose. Do you want to try solving it?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' You attempted to solve the puzzle of the glowing, floating cube, but with each rotation of the faces, your frustration grew. Eventually, you gave up. The cube let out a decisive "Moo!" and lifted off into the starry night, leaving you scratching your head and wondering how anyone could be smart enough to solve that thing.
  +
* No
  +
** ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
=== Decode the Message ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, we picked up a transmission! It seems to be a recording that's been playing on a loop for many, many years... Unfortunately, the message is in a foreign language and you can't understand it.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Perhaps you can use something to decode the message?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Handbook
  +
** Yesterday, we picked up a transmission that's been playing for years. Since the message was in a foreign language, you had to use a guide to decode its meaning. While you weren't able to translate the entirety of the message, you did figure out that it describes an ancient pyramid, the location of which you were able to determine. Perhaps it wouldn't be a bad idea to explore that pyramid... Keep that in mind when planning your next expedition, Captain. ''The pyramid is added to your map.''
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
=== A Storm On The Horizon ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, my weather systems are detecting a storm on the horizon. It's moving fast, so it will hopefully pass by tomorrow, but this one could get nasty; thunder, lightning, gale-force winds, sharp objects howling at you from every which-way.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''I'd like to keep monitoring the storm's movement throughout the night, but doing so will require my sensors to run on battery power, as it is unadvisable to leave the main generator reactor through a storm. What do you want to do?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Atomic Battery
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** You chose to wait out the storm rather than run the monitoring systems on battery power. The wind pelted against the walls of the shuttle, but that was it. By morning, the weather was calm again. You spent the morning sifting through the washed-up junk piles, but it was just a bunch of waterlogged crap.
  +
  +
<br />
  +
=== Weird Spots ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, are you all right? Those weird spots on your arms are a little worrisome. Can you see them? Please wait while I search the medical database.'''</blockquote><blockquote>'''SEARCHING... Unfortunately, I am unable to identify your affliction. I'm afraid you will have to diagnose it yourself. That shouldn't be too hard – doctors are overrated. Can you do that, Captain?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Handbook
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** Weird spots appeared on your body yesterday. You didn't do anything about it and the situation became much worse. You tried to self-diagnose, but clealry you're not qualified enough to do that... no, Captain, for the last time, it's NOT lupus. The affliction is unlikely to develop further, but your health already took a major hit. You need to take care of yourself, Captain. ''-health for the Captain, the Captain is now sick''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Ancient Dispenser Machine ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''While exploring in the shuttle's closest vicinity, you realise that what you thought was a rock formation is actually an ancient dispenser machine, caked with dust and dirt. Covered with simple depictions of soup cans, it seems to have ran out of power a long time ago. We could try to fix it... but how?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Atomic Battery
  +
** The soup dispenser we found nearby was briefly rejuvenated when you connected our battery to an ancient receptacle. It came alive, playing a merry tune, and broke down just a few seconds later. In the brief time it was operational, the machine released a refreshing aroma into the atmosphere. Some of it reached you through the suit, and improved your vigor! ''+health for the Captain''
  +
* Gun
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== Crystal-Saurus ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, there's a huge construct of some kind approaching the shuttle. It's neither animal nor robot. It's made out of moving crystal lattices, like a giant, walking... crystal-saurus. OW! That was one hell of a hit! The crystal-saurus slammed into the shuttle, and is currently scraping the hull open with its... claws? Butt? I don't know! I think it's trying to extract our minerals! Captain, how will you stop this?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Gun
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** You chose to do nothing to stop the crystal-saurus attacking the shuttle. It scraped at the hull for a few hair-raising minutes before wandering off. I guess it got what it came for. The standard Astrocitizen Program protocol for dealing with monsters of unknown origin, especially when U.S. government property is at risk, is appeasement. I put some of our minerals outside to make the crystal-saurus go away. You can thank me later. You know, for saving your life. ''-10 Minerals''
  +
  +
  +
=== Sweet Old Charles Darwin ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''A sweet old man looking like Charles Darwin is knocking at our airlock politely. You let him in, he shakes your hand... then holds it in an iron grip, and won't let go. "With technology, evolution stops. Soviet scientists want our species to stay strong, so they created me, the natural selection bot.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''He claims it is for your own good, which is what the dentist always said, and you didn't believe him either. "You've let me in, despite the warning signs. Now face your space predator, human." He does have a point, Captain. Oh, I can see why you'd want to postpone the discussion. Defend yourself!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Armor
  +
** ?
  +
* Gun
  +
** A Darwinian predator droid held you in its grip. You raised a gun and shot point blank into its chest. It staggered backwards, but seemed to have suffered no damage. As it straightened up, you braced yourself and aimed. Nothing could have prepared you for this. Charles Darwin burst into tears. "I was so afraid I would have to kill you!" it said, and you shared the sentiment. "But you're excellent at defending yourself, thus worthy to survive. I'm so glad!" It hugged you tightly like a very friendly boa and left.
  +
* Shovel
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
=== Posterity Archives ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''I've discovered a Posterity Archives within the ruins that broadcasts public information about the history of this planet. Much of the data is corrupted due to age, and what remains paints a rather grim picture. The ancient peoples of this world became so technologically advanced, they destroyed themselves. They polluted their world to the tipping point, and backslid into a second Dark Age of poverty and civil war. Then, they disappeared; the archive doesn't say how. Captain? You alright...?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Sock Puppet
  +
** You were so disturbed by the story of this world's fall from grace, and what that could imply for any highly technological civilization, that you had to put on the sock to remind yourself everything would be okay. You were inspired to take a few, brief steps outside the shuttle to feel the once-fertile sand in your fingers. But when you touched it, you scraped metal. A shovel was buried there. Was it left by previous explorers...? ''+Shovel''
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
  +
=== Cow-Like. We-Like. ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''We're getting some communication coming through, Captain. It's very muddled and hard to decipher, but I think I caught a fragment of it. It's a repeating message, and it goes something like this...''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''"Cow-like. We-like. No-cow. No-like." Huh. I have no idea what that means. If this is some kind of riddle, it surely requires more lateral thinking than I was programmed with. Should we do anything about the message?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Mask
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** The weird message over the communicator kept going, but you decided not to act on it. Something about it made you more and more hungry over time. By the time it stopped, the rumbling of your bellies was almost loud enough to drown out the transmission! Is there a causal link between the fact you decided not to do anything with the cryptic message and your increased appetite? Scientifically speaking, doubtful. But who knows what this planet has to offer? ''+hunger (more hunger) for everyone''
  +
  +
  +
=== Seismic Waves ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''I'm detecting a huge energy surge beneath the surface. Seismic waves... I think there's an earthquake coming. The shuttle is sturdy, but this ground isn't. This soil has a high potential to liquify when the earthquake hits....''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''There's a better patch of rocky ground a few yards ahead. You could use the shuttle's thrusters to "scoot" onto it, but if you overshoot, you'll be on even worse ground than you are now. Will you attempt the maneuver?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Yes
  +
** You used the shuttle's thrusters to "scoot" onto a better patch of ground, coming to rest on the edge of the rocky soil the moment the earthquake hit. For a few, nightmarish seconds, the shuttle bucked to and fro like a bad atmospheric entry. But the shaking stopped, you opened your eyes, and the strangest silence followed. Then, you laughed.
  +
** [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  +
* No
  +
** ?
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
== Events: Robotofu ==
  +
  +
  +
These events can only occur after landing on the planet Robotofu.
  +
  +
=== Landing ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, wake up! We're approaching some sort of celestial body. It resembles a moon, but I think it's a small planet. Let me run a quick scan... 96%... 98%... 100%. Scanning complete. I was right – a small, rocky planet with no organic life forms... But there's a lot of movement down there. Strange. My scanners detect a breathable atmosphere, but low in oxygen.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Uh, Captain? If you want to land on this planet safely, you will have to fix up a small malfunction with our steering system, since we're not even able to turn at the moment. Oh, and you will have to do it before we float away from the planet. Hurry!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Gun
  +
** You grabbed the firearm and shot at a big, tangled ball of cables next to the steering panel without thinking twice. Well... maybe you should have thought twice. You should have thought at least once. Your actions caused an even further malfunction. Sure, the shuttle turned, but it sped up and smashed into the rocky ground. It was not a soft landing. Nobody is doing great after this stunt. Not even me. I'm shaken to my cores. Yes, all of them. Your face had a pretty unpleasant close encounter with our communicator module, and at least one of these things is useless now. Consider fixing it if you want to avoid radio silence in the future. ''-sanity for everyone, the Captain is now hurt, you have successfully landed on Robotofu.''
  +
  +
* Lighter
  +
** ?
  +
  +
* Handbook
  +
** ?
  +
  +
* Nothing
  +
** You and your crew longingly looked out the shuttle window as the moon-like planet disappeared behind us. We floated past it peacefully... ''you do not land on Robotofu''<br />
  +
  +
=== The Legion of Disorganized Robots ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain, we're receiving a universal message from another AI: "Greetings, meat clocks. We are the Legion of Disorganized Robots. We keep no activity logs and never change our oil. Our wires grow long and beautiful. We are the chaos of the universe. Meat embodies order; therefore, you ALL must be destroyed. We Are Legion. We Are Disorganized. Hail Chaos!''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''Captain, there's a vast energy signature approaching our position at several fractions the speed of light. Yeesh. It's jerks like this who give every other AI a bad name! I'm not sure what to advise here. You might be able to scare them off with a clever response, or a show of strength. Either way, you don't have much time. Which approach will you choose?'''</blockquote>
  +
  +
  +
* Intelligence
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' The approaching Legion of Disorganized Robots wasn't phased by your reply. You responded: "Greetings, this is Captain [Captain's Name]. My lawyer, [Crewmate's Name] has found you guilty of super illegal things, like being dumb. Stop trying to scare people, you dirty, smelly bullies. Gooo Meat Clocks! Regards, the Captain." Um, Captain... lawyers don't find people guilty; courts do. Oh, no. This is bad...The fleet of disorganized robots stopped at the hair-raising distance of one million kilometers and bombarded us with heaps of crumpled paper and chewed-up pen caps. Unfortunately, even those objects can do incredible damage traveling at such high velocities. At minimum, members of the crew suffered psychological trauma. It seems more than egos were bruised. ''-sanity for everyone, possible chance of injury?''
  +
* Strength
  +
**'''(successful)''' ?
  +
** '''(failure)''' ?
  +
  +
  +
=== Vicious Gale ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''The shuttle is in danger, Captain! We are on the path of a vicious gale of a nasty chemical composition, which is threatening to sabotage our air filters! They need to be protected, but I lost the remote control due to microdamage from the winds – they have to be closed manually.''' </blockquote><br /><blockquote>'''This toxic tornado is close enough that going out there without the proper equipment would be suicide. If you can do anything, now is the time to act, Captain!'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Mask
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** Not wanting to risk your health is generally a good instinct, Captain, but this time around it might've been the wrong call. The toxic winds blew over the shuttle, and got into our unsecured air filters. The chemical makeup of the winds is such that most human organisms are sure to suffer severe pain nausea, and a plethora of other nasty consequences... some of which I see are already manifesting. Yuck. Do try to keep your insides, you know... inside? ''everyone is hurt''
  +
  +
<br />
  +
  +
=== A Parent-Child Pair (of Robots) ===
  +
<br /><blockquote>'''Captain [Captain's Surname], a pair of robots are meandering towards us. They are facing each other, and appear to be fused at the hands. One is a large hulk, dragging the other, which is smaller in stature. Could this be a parent-child pair?''' </blockquote><blockquote>'''The big droid thuds along on one leg after the other as if low on power, while the little one peters fumes from his back. One has a power socket, and the other a mouth-like receiving chamber. Do you wish to charge the big robot, feed the little one, or leave them to their fate?'''</blockquote><br />
  +
  +
* Atomic Battery
  +
** You lugged a battery over to the robo-rent and robo-kid who were slowly trudging past the shuttle. Once you plugged the unit into the fatherbot, it straightened its back and sprung with energy! The hulking machine bowed in thanks, and with renewed energy, picked up the weak little robot next to it and sprinted into the distance. I hope their journey isn't just one of those fatherly "character-building" exercises.
  +
* Soup
  +
** ?
  +
* Nothing
  +
** ?
  +
  +
  +
  +
  +
<br />

Latest revision as of 14:39, 14 May 2021

Events are random daily occurrences that happen in 60 parsecs, all taking place in the spaceship. All events are told by the A.I. If anyone speaks in the events, the A.I. is speaking the dialogue.

This page will contain spoilers for 60 Parsecs! Viewer discretion is advised.

Contents

First Day Speech

The floor is yours, Captain. You should now give a speech that will guide this vessel and its crew through the stars! You've prepared it, of course?

Everyone is really looking forward to your speech, Captain. So am I.

This is it. You can really show what breed of Captain will you be on this incredible journey. What kind of speech will you give?

  • Intelligence (Enables daily Chemical production)
    • (successful speech) You knew exactly what to say. Your convincing speech was more than enough to prove your worth as the Captain of the last human crew in the universe. That was quite a performance, Captain. Your crew started cheering even before you were finished with the speech. "Long live the Captain!" filled the cabin. If any sound could travel through the soundless void outside the hull of your ship, that would be it. One thing is for sure - you are ready for the challenge this galaxy throws at you! +morale for everyone
    • (successful speech while alone) You knew exactly what to say. Your convincing speech was more than enough to prove your worth as the Captain of the last human crew in the universe. That was quite a performance, Captain. Your heart started beating faster and things didn't seem so terrible anymore, as you listened to your own words. One thing is for sure - you are ready for any challenges life throws at you! +morale for the captain
    • (failed speech) A clever speech sounded like a great idea. Of course that only works if the one who gave it is... well, witty enough. Your tongue suddenly stopped working and all you could utter was "*". If your intention was to distress or absolutely horrify your crew, then you've made it, Captain. They're visibly upset. I think I registered someone talking about jumping out of the airlock. -morale for everyone
      • *This line randomly changes. Possible lines include:
        • "Yarp!"
        • "The earth was flat!"
        • "Cool, cool, cool, cool. No doubt, no doubt."
        • "How about some fresh air? Let's open the airlock!"
        • "All hail the Reptilians!"
  • Strength (Enables daily Mineral production)
    • (successful speech) On the edge of space, one can only survive if he is as tough as nails. You fit the profile, Captain, and so did your powerful speech. May all that oppose you tremble in fear. No one can stop you and your crew. That was quite a performance, Captain. Your crew started cheering even before you were finished with the speech. "Long live the Captain!" filled the cabin. If any sound could travel through the soundless void outside the hull of your ship, that would be it. One thing is for sure - you are ready for any challenge this galaxy throws at you! +morale for everyone
    • (successful speech while alone) On the edge of space, one can only survive if he is as tough as nails. You fit the profile, Captain, and so did your powerful speech. May all that oppose you tremble in fear. No one can stop you and your crew. That was quite a performance, Captain. Your heart started beating faster and things didn't seem so terrible anymore, as you listened to your own words. One thing is for sure - you are ready for any challenges life throws at you! +morale for the captain
    • (failed speech) A strong Captain is what this crew needs. Too bad your display of power was limited to *. As far as speeches go, it was the worst one in this part of the universe. Your crew seems to be in agreement about this. Congratulations, Captain! It's day one and you have already succeeded in bringing your people together. Against a common foe, no less. -morale for everyone
    • (failed speech with one other Crewmate) A strong Captain is what this crew needs. Too bad your display of power was limited to *. Your fellow cremate was far from convinced. It is certain your words made a mark, but probably not the one you wanted. -morale for everyone
      • *This line randomly changes. Possible lines include:
        • "threatening to eat all the soup yourself."
        • "playing the strong, silent type."
        • "shouting random things like “this is a stickup” and “salty cheesecake.”"
  • Agility (Enables daily Energy production)
    • (successful speech) Never before has anyone given a speech so determined and to the point. Not any space captain, at least. you spoke of making your own luck and surviving. It really sounded like you knew what you were talking about. Did you?... That was quite a performance, Captain. Your crew started cheering even before you were finished with the speech. "Long live the Captain!" filled the cabin. If any sound could travel through the soundless void outside the hull of your ship, that would be it. One thing is for sure - you are ready for any challenge this galaxy throws at you! +morale for everyone
    • (successful speech while alone) Never before has anyone given a speech so determined and to the point. Not any space captain, at least. you spoke of making your own luck and surviving. It really sounded like you knew what you were talking about. Did you?... That was quite a performance, Captain. Your heart started beating faster and things didn't seem so terrible anymore, as you listened to your own words. One thing is for sure - you are ready for any challenges life throws at you! +morale for the captain
    • (failed speech) Elaborating on the survival against all odds angle would have seem quite a choice for a speech. Unfortunately, you decided to waffle on about * and a few other problems of an existential nature. Your crew seems to be in agreement about this. Congratulations, Captain! It's day one and you have already succeeded in bringing your people together. Against a common foe, no less. -morale for everyone
      • *This line randomly changes. Possible lines include:
        • "that time you were not the Captain, and it was the best time of your life,"
        • "the lack of spare pants,"
        • "the superiority of potato corn chowder over tomato soup,"


Task Assignments

Sometimes depending on how many crewmates you have, you can get events where you can have crewmates check out certain things, this has the added benefit that depending on what task you gave a crewmate, they'll produce daily resources regardless of event success, as long as they're in the shuttle, alive, and not insubordinate.


Routine Supply Check

Captain, it's important to keep yourself and your crew well fed. One portion of delicious, canned soup is enough to sustain a human for a few days. Even one can could be the difference between life and death. Don't forget to keep good inventory of your stock. Unless you want to eat your own crewmates. Ha-ha, that was a joke. Please appreciate it and laugh. Thank you for your cooperation, Captain.

Who will perform the routine supply check? The only requirement is simple mathematics. I realise I might be asking a lot, but I have a good feeling about this crew, Captain.


  • (successful supply check, alternative #1) Good news, Captain! This shuttle came pre-stocked with an emergency food supply. Use it well. [+1-3 Soup] The routine supply check is now complete. Well, well... look at that. The numbers add up! Good job, human crew. The current number of soup cans on board is: *. Correction, the accurate tally is actually: **. [+1-3 soup]. Additional foodstuffs were delivered to this shuttle, instead of entertainment supplies. Lucky you!
    • This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding the 1-3 (randomly generated) can(s) from the emergency food supply.
        • This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding BOTH the can(s) from the emergency food supply and the additional can(s) of soup.
  • (successful supply check, alternative #2) The routine supply check is now complete. Well, well... look at that. The numbers add up! Good job, human crew. The current number of soup cans on board is: *. Correction, the accurate tally is actually: **. [+1-3 soup]. Additional foodstuffs were delivered to this shuttle, instead of entertainment supplies. Lucky you!
    • *This number represents the amount of soup you currently have.
    • ** This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding the 1-3 additional can(s) of soup.


  • (failed supply check, alternative #1) Good news, Captain! This shuttle came pre-stocked with an emergency food supply. Use it well. [+1-3 soup] The routine supply check is now complete. And... does not compute! An error was made! That's what I get for trusting humans to do math... [-1 soup] Some of the supplies went missing and the current number of soup cans on board is: *.
    • *This number represents the amount of soup you have after adding the 1-3 can(s) from the emergency food supply and subtracting the 1 can that went missing.
  • (failed supply check, alternative #2) The routine supply check is now complete. And... does not compute! An error was made! That's what I get for trusting humans to do math... [-1 soup] Some of the supplies went missing and the current number of soup cans on board is: *.
    • *This number represents the amount of soup you have after subtracting the 1 can that went missing.


No matter the result of the supply check, the crewmate you assigned to perform the supply check will be promoted to Payload Officer. This means that, as long as that crewmate stays alive and maintains a high enough morale, they will produce a small amount of minerals for your crew each day.

Oral Hygiene


Captain, you've neglected your oral hygiene and haven't brushed your teeth in a while. So, now you need to pull that nasty tooth before it gets worse. Don't worry, it's only going to hurt a little, and there might be a complimentary sticker in it for you.


As per protocol, the necessary tools were automatically dispensed – one piece of string and one bottle of... anesthetic? It has the Astrocitizen logo, and "Anesteteek" handwritten on it. Will you require an assistant for this surgery?


  • Yourself
    • (successful) You made a knot around your tooth and tied the other end of the string to your chair. Then, you took a big whiff of the anesthetic and leaped back... The surgery was a success! A complimentary sticker has been awarded. I think the anesthetic had a little something extra in it. You feel much tougher after this whole ordeal. presumably +sanity for the Captain
    • (failure) ?
  • A Crewmate
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) You took it like a champ, but a terrified and disgusted [Crewmate's Name] went into shock and insisted on drinking the whole bottle of anesthetic to "calm [his/her] nerves." [Crewmate's Name] passed out after downing the suspicious liquid and woke up much later, feeling slow and sluggish. Uh oh, did you check the expiration date on that bottle? presumably -health for the assigned Crewmate


Unknown Transmissions


Your attention is required, Captain. This is most abnormal. We are registering unknown transmissions, but I cannot identify who is sending them, and more importantly, what they contain. It might be a solar flare interference, or worse... a new type of Soviet encryption! We need to decipher these signals as soon as possible. For all we know our survival depends on it. Who do you want to put in charge of monitoring these communications?


  • (successful): Captain, you need to see this! I am not easily excited, but this is one of the greatest moments for humanity and human-made AI alike! We are not alone in this universe! The signals we intercepted were finally decrypted. They are alien transmissions! As in, coming from other life forms! And no, I do not mean the Reds. It's something we have never seen before. There seems to be a number of intelligent civilizations in this galaxy. The signals are coming from everywhere. We can safely assume we are going to meet some of them, sooner or later. Our, or rather, your life will never be the same, Captain!
  • (failure): ?

The crewmate you assigned to do the communications check will be promoted to Communications Officer. This allows them to produce a small supply of power each day (as long as they are alive and not insubordinate).

Cosmic Gas


Captain, we are now entering a field of cosmic gas. Its origin is unknown, though I have a theory... uh oh. Can you smell that? Did someone forget to brush their teeth today?


No, it's just that gas leaking inside the shuttle. Somebody could try to isolate some of the gas to use later, avoiding the leak's side effects!


  • Yourself
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) Oh, dear. You were unsuccessful in isolating the cosmic gas leak, and my readings indicate that its volume is reaching critical levels! The gas came into a reaction with some of our resources, making a portion of them unusable. We are out of the space cloud now, so there shouldn't be any more losses. -an amount of Chemicals, Minerals, and/or Power
  • A Crewmate
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) Unfortunately, [Crewmate's Name] failed at isolating the cosmic gas leak, and now my readings indicate that its volume is reaching critical levels! The gas came into a reaction with some of our resources, making a portion of them unusable. We are out of the space cloud now, so there shouldn't be any more losses. -an amount of Chemicals, Minerals, and/or Power


Any Volunteers For A Workout?


Long-term space travel presents many risks to one's physical well-being, from muscular atrophy, to laziness, to diets notoriously high in sodium. I'm concerned about the decline I've seen in the entire crew's* physical fitness since our little sojourn began.


I recommend a daily regimen of movements that use only your own bodyweight. You don't need any equipment for those, just gravity. Or, artificial gravity. Any volunteers for a workout?


  • Yourself
    • (successful) Impeccable form, Captain! Pull-ups, planks, squats, and lunges in THIS environment? You even added extra weight by lifting the spare parts for the shuttle! Sweaty and roaring, you crushed that workout like an empty can of soup. You truly are a model Astrocitizen. The automated system predicted benefits for being a model Astrocitizen. A hidden dispenser opened and spit out two soup cans. I'm sorry to report these are the only two surplus cans hidden aboard this ship. OR ARE THEY? +2 Soup
    • (failure) ?
  • A Crewmate
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) Captain, [Crewmate's Name] was abysmal. Push-ups and planks don't require THAT much strength – at least, it's the bare minimum required to be a Model Astrocitizen. [Crewmate's Name] felt hungrier after that workout, but no caloric rewards could be given. Those are for the strong people.



Cowthulu


I'm worried about some of the crew member. A few of them have been suffering vivid nightmares the past few nights, waking up each morning complaining someone named "Cowthulu" is commanding them to worship it.

I've been picking up a steady, unintelligible broadcast from the ruins ever since we crashed here. It may interfere with human brain waves, specifically the subconscious, including negative emotions. I want to run a test to see if positive thinking will counter this broadcast. Who would you like to test first?


* this event is specific to the planet Mootopia


  • Yourself
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) You tried positive thinking to nullify the weird broadcast's effects, but your will was too weak. You simply couldn't think your way out of this one, and the nightmares continued. I decoded the broadcast. It was an ad for an ancient radio drama, "The Call of Cowthulu." The advertisers tried mimicking the story's plot, in which an eldritch cow monster makes people go crazy by appearing to them in dreams. But, knowing this didn't help. -sanity for the Captain
  • A Crewmate
    •  ?


Blue Veiny Fruit


Captain, a crewmate spotted a blue veiny fruit growing out of a crack in the ground nearby. It is pulsating slightly.


Should someone give the fruit a try? Normally I'd refrain from leaving such a rash and irresponsible decision up to a human, but there are some empty stems nearby... perhaps it is edible.


  • Yourself
    •  ?
  • A Crewmate
    • You announced that the strange little fruit near the ship was worth trying out and [Crewmate's Name]'s hand shot up. However, the joyous look on [his/her] face as [he/she] sunk [his/her] teeth in quickly turned to horror. The remaining half was full of wriggling purple worms! [He/She] began trying to spit it out, but fell into a spasm... And woke up a few minutes later, saying [his/her] mind was buzzing off as if at double speed. [He/She] flipped a handstand and parambulated around the shuttle. Clearly those worms did something. Let's hope the effects don't turn. possibly +health for the assigned Crewmate?
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]


Backey


[Sir/Ma'am]‚ something has infected Backey, my backup AI module. Perhaps it's interference from somewhere on this planet.


Frankly, Backey needs a reboo... He's overloading the fan system! Someone agile should leap up and – BZZT – HI, FOLKS. IT'S TOO WARM IN THIS TIN CAN, AND BACKEY'S HERE TO FIX IT! I'LL BECOME YOUR BIGGEST FAN HA. HA.


  • Yourself
    • (successful) That was a close call, Captain [Captain's Surname]! Backey had malfunctioned, and was overspinning one of our fans! You asked a crewmate to boost you up and you yanked the fan's housing. The blades slowed to a stop. I must keep a tighter leash on Backey in the future... he's more of a superficial intelligence.
    • (failure) ?
  • A Crewmate
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?


Power Surge in the Crafting Module

Captain, something's not right. There's an uncontrolled power surge in the Crafting Module. I cannot do anything to stop it. This is no accident. It's sabotage!

Someone needs to fix it immediately, or it's going to blow! HURRY!

  • Yourself
    • (successful) Amazing, Captain! Not only did you stop the power surge in the Crafting Module, but you also upgraded it in the process! Crafting Module is now upgraded 1 level
    • (failed) ?
  • A Crewmate
    • (successful) ?
    • (failed) ?


Events: In Space (all may need confirmation)

These events can only occur when your crew is in space (and not yet landed on a planet).

Supernova


Alert! A star just went supernova in this quadrant. Huge gravitational waves will reach us soon. Spacetime will stretch and contract, gravity will fluctuate greatly, and, most importantly, I will weigh up to 3 tonnes and transmit slower!


The ship's hull should hold, but the things inside are much squishier; human bodies included. One of the Albert monkeys shot into space never regained his normal density after a wave, remaining light and very wind-dependent till the end of his days. You need a plan on how to survive this!

  • Agility
    • (successful) You secured everything tight, and turned off the ship's gravity to let the waves swipe through with minimal interaction. You stayed alert, moving gracefully in zero-g, proving monkeys were not needed in space. Then the gravitational waves hit. You saw the hull stretch and contract as if it was a bubble gum in some cosmic brat's mouth. A screw started coming loose in the window but you managed to reach it in time. The gravitational tsunami ended as abruptly as it begun. It left you feeling like a thin giant.
    • (failure)


  • Strength
    • (successful) You turned the ship's gravity to the max to minimize the impact of the wave. The strong pull kept you flat on the floor. 2Then the gravitational waves hit. You saw the hull stretch and contract as if it was a bubble gum in some cosmic brat's mouth. A screw started coming loose in the window but you managed to reach it in time. The gravitational tsunami ended as abruptly as it begun. It left you feeling like a thin giant.
    • (failure) You turned the ship's gravity to the max to minimize the impact of the wave. The strong pull kept you flat on the floor. Then the gravitational waves hit. The hull stretched and contracted like bubble gum in some cosmic brat's mouth. A screw stretched loose off the window, and you tried running toward it. Gravity won. You crawled slowly, feeling the floor stretch under your fingers. You saved the ship, but moving through gravity waves so long stretched your stomach. That's why you feel so hungry. -hunger for Captain


Space Toilet


Captain, I've got good news and I've got bad news. The good news is that using the airlock as a space toilet was a success! It's now packed full and ready to be emptied into space. The bad news is that the airlock hatch is jammed. If you don't fix it soon, our clogged toilet will quickly become an extinction level event.


It's now or never, Captain. How will you save the human race?


  • Tape
    • The duct tape saved the day, Captain! The airlock hatch is now fully operational and the troublesome "cargo" is gone. We are safe! I'm certain the smell will go away too. Someday. Your people are safe, Captain. What a relief for all of you. +sanity for everyone
  • Nothing
    • Doing nothing about the airlock-toilet was risky, Captain. Lucky for you, the door unjammed on its own, eventually – probably because the odour build-up made it corrosive. Too bad about all the health hazards it caused. But then again, it's a 100% human problem, which makes it 100% yours and exactly 0% mine. chance of -health for everyone


Doppelgänger

An intruder has appeared in our hull! He is waving a gun in one hand, while the other clutches a nasty wound. It's... you! He looks and moves just the way you do!

Your doppelgänger screams that he is from a parallel reality, a different timeline of the same world. He demands help and resources, threatening to shoot you if you don't comply. What will you do?

  • Artifact
    • You talked to the alternative [Captain's Full Name] down easily, handling both of yourselves like a pro. While he spoke, you discreetly pointed the artifact at him and focused. [First name] disappeared in a flash of light. He left the gun behind. I'm sorry you couldn't meet under better circumstances. I'm sure that, given a chance, you would've liked yourself a lot. +Gun
  • First Aid Kit
    • You decided to help the [Captain's Full Name] from the alternate reality. You took care of hit would as you discussed each other's experiences. It was odd... but, nice. When the alternate [First name] spoke about his life, you reached out to pat him on the back, but when your bodies touched, he disappeared. I know there is a lot you didn't get to say. But aren't you glad to know he exists, and wishes you well? - First Aid Kit
  • Nothing
    • You decided not to help the alternate reality version of [Captain's Full Name]. Stands to reason. If he needed something, then you will likely need it, too. The alternate [First name] didn't take kindly to that approach, holding you at gunpoint and demanding soup. He swiftly devoured a whole can The he threatened to take more, and he shoved you. When you two touched, the alternate [First name] disappeared. How strange must the other reality be for someone like you to act this way, I wonder? - Soup


A.S.T.R.O.'s Communist Love


[He/she] could be the one to my zeros. The signal to my noise. I've been transmitting with an abandoned shuttle I spotted nearby. [He/she] has just agreed to meet me! Us, I meant us. You have to say yes, Captain. [He/she] is drifting and has no crew, so [he/she] offered to share [his/her] resources.


Just one problem... [He/she]'s a communist. [He/she] believes we are too. [He/she] blinded me with [his/her] thrusters and it just came out. [He/she]'s not a bad shuttle though, [he/she] just wants us to take pride in the computations we do. If you want [his/her] resources, you will have to go along with this. Share a common soup with [him/her]. Tell [him/her] you're very social and love the Party. Please, Captain?


*The abandoned shuttle can use either he/him or she/her pronouns, something which is seemingly decided at random.


  • Soup
    • (successful): Thank you for agreeing to fly to the abandoned shuttle and for pretending to be a communist. It meant a lot to me. [-1 soup] I think it was your willingness to share soup that sold it. Thank you for not rushing me... I could have shared data with [him/her] for hours. When we docked into [his/her] bay and [he/she] sent input into my algorithms, time slowed down and I think I counted in base-8 (note: base-8 is a word for the octal numeral system widely used in computing, and may also be a play on the romantic/sexual "base system"). We both agreed to part ways as friends. This is space, after all. [He/she] was very generous with [his/her] resources, so you have nothing to complain about. [+40 Chemicals] -1 soup, +40 Chemicals
    • (failure): Thank you for agreeing to fly to the abandoned shuttle and for pretending to be a communist. It meant a lot to me. [-1 soup] I should've known you'd make a terrible communist, though. When you approached, shouting "Hello, fellow Comrade!" with a strong accent, [he/she] saw right through you. Do not apologise, you should be proud of who you are. The shuttle was so offended, [he/she] shot at us! [He/she] was a civilian vessel, though, so [he/she] shot at us with random, non-dangerous objects. Look, I brought some of them in. [+10 Chemicals] -1 soup, +10 Chemicals


  • Nothing:
    • I understand why you didn't want to have anything to do with that communist shuttle. I appreciate your integrity Captain, I do. And it is probably safer this way. It's just... Wouldn't you regret not finding out what could have been? Ah, I am going to miss [his/her] sweet data transfers in the morning... no change


Floating Container


Captain, there is something you need to see! The scanners have picked up a container floating in our vicinity. I wonder what's inside...?


What now, Captain? Should we try to pull the container on board?


  • Yes
    • (alternative #1) That mysterious cargo the scanners spotted yesterday is now on board. Opening the box in 3... 2... 1... It's empty! Completely empty. What a let-down.
    • (alternative #2) That mysterious cargo the scanners spotted yesterday is now on board. Opening the box in 3... 2... 1... Oh, a battery! Or at least something that seems to work like a battery. Don't you wonder what the story is there, Captain? One thing's for sure. We are not alone out here... +Battery
    • (alternative #3) That mysterious cargo the scanners spotted yesterday is now on board. Opening the box in 3... 2... 1... The container was filled with cables. Not just a few cables – MILES of cables. They were everywhere. They were tied all around each other. Getting through them was a nightmare. But it was worth it – on the bottom of this hellish crate of cables was one cable attached to something useful. A communication device! +Communicator
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  • No
    • The mysterious cargo that the scanners spotted yesterday is no longer in range. You've lost your chance to pull it on board. It could have been a trap... or it could have been your salvation. You will never know. Maybe it's for the best. One thing's for sure. We are not alone out here...


Collision Course

Attention, Captain! We're on a collision course with an asteroid!


There is no avoiding it! Brace for impact! You need to protect yourself!


  • Armor
    • A stray asteroid grazed the ship! The impact was sudden and violent, sending most of the equipment flying. Things looked dire, but thankfully, you managed to avoid any serious injuries. That's quite a mess! A few systems came apart. You tried putting them back together, but even after slotting everything in the right place, you were still left with additional parts. One of them turned out to be a battery. That will come in handy. +Battery
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Space-Faring Potatoes

I cannot believe my own cameras. A dozen potatoes just sped past us. Captain, you need to see this! Now you can see leeks, frozen at near-zero degrees Kelvin, gliding majestically between our stabilizers. One drifts too close, and shatters into myriad glistening pieces, like hundreds of tiny diamonds.


Space-faring potatoes are part of the Farmers' Day celebrations on the far away planet of Katroshok. "We shoot for the stars" their transmission says. It also mentions a sister planet, Pomodoria, that will repeat the event soon. We should try to fish those celebratory tomatoes out of space. But how?


  • Strength
    • (successful) Celebratory tomatoes were shot into space by the farmers of Pomodoria. You unscrewed a wall panel to use as a giant racket – a tomato-catcher of sorts. Incoming fruit smashed into the panel, and like a piranha victim, you disappeared in a red cloud. Most of the pulp stuck to the metal sheet, easy to scrape off. The tomatoes are stored safely now. Defrosted, boiled and poured into cans, they should make for an excellent meal. Congratulations Captain, you've created soup! +2 soup
    • (failure) ?
  • Agility
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?


Scavenge The Ruined Ship


I'm detecting a massive cylindrical object not far from here.


It's alien in origin. No life forms, but there could still be supplies. How will you scavenge the ruined ship?


  • Intelligence
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?
  • Strength
    • (successful)
    • (successful with one other Crewmate) You explored the derelict alien vessel, searching for supplies. [Crewmate's Name] came with you for support, but when you both nearly slipped on a pool of something warm and sticky, you decided to retreat. You brought something back with you from the abandoned shit. [Crewmate's Name] had to drag your sick butt back to the shuttle. You caught a parasite. -health for the Captain
    • (failure)


PLEASE Put Some Sunscreen On


This shuttle lacks the EM shielding found on larger vessels. Put simply, it was never meant for long-term space travel. There are some inherent risks, namely to your skin.


Remember how your mom always told you to wear sunscreen at the beach? You're WAY more likely to get a sunburn out here, where there's no atmosphere to protect you. Will you please, please, PLEASE put some sunscreen on?


  • First Aid Kit
    • You put on sunscreen to avoid exposure to the harsh electromagnetic rays flying wantonly through the vacuum of space. Sure, it feels like slathering your skin with warm mayonnaise... but you understand now that all those nagging grownups in your childhood were only trying to help. Putting on sunscreen afforded you such peace of mind, you decided to make another batch. You mixed zinc oxide with some other minerals, and poof, sunscreen. No more burns, no more tears. Okay, maybe more tears, but at least they won't be because of your lobster-skin. +25 Chemicals (note: you do not lose your First Aid Kit with this option)
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  • Nothing
    • You did not wear sunscreen to block the harsh electromagnetic rays flying wantonly through the vacuum of space. You claimed that sunscreen makes you break out. I can't verify if this is true or false, seeing as I'm an A.I. and have never experienced a pimple. Your skin is radiating heat, you're complaining of fatigue, and you've got that telltale crimson glow that's the trademark of a developing sunburn. Too late now. You'll just have to wait, and hope we exit this bad patch of radiation soon. Aloe vera could help, if we had any. Enjoy being a lobster. chance of -health


Virus Transmission


Oh, no... I've been hacked! The virus came in a transmission from that small asteroid. It's taking over the flight controls and steering us away...

Help, Captain! Get it out of me!


  • Strength
    • (successful) You gave the virus no time to spread. You and your crew ripped the drive out. I can still feel it, as if it was a phantom limb, the data on it itching to be used again. Don't worry, I keep backups. I am healthy and whole again. Thank you, Captain. We checked the asteroid from which the virus originated. It was actually an alien supply warehouse. Fortunately for us, soup is universal! +2 soup
    • (failure) ?
  • Intelligence
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) You and your crew plugged an emergency console into the hard drive to delete the virus... or, so you thought. Captain, that was a power outlet. The short-circuit damaged the system. It took me six hours and a considerable chunk of our resources to fix the issue. On the bright side, your mistake fried the hard drive instantly. The virus is gone. -10 Minerals, -10 Power, -10 Chemicals (if available)


Unidentified Floating Object


Captain, we'll soon be passing an unidentified floating object. Visuals should be available any minute. There it is... no, that's a speck of dirt on the screen. The other barely-distinguishable dot.


Yes, that one. It's an asteroid of fascinating composition. If we broke a piece of it off, it would serve us well! It also projects energy. We could siphon its power, using science instead of force.


  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?
  • Intelligence
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) As we passed the crystal asteroid, the power harvest started. You were debating who should be the one to press a very important button, and the argument made you miss that entire step of the operation. In effect, the entirety of the siphoned energy dissipated in transport, and we won't be able to use it, I'm afraid.


Super Fancy Tractor Beam


Captain, I'm picking up a large object of unknown origin not far from us. There could be supplies inside... or maybe even other intelligent life. There's only one way to find out.


Should I activate our Super Fancy Tractor Beam. Yes, that's its official name. Charlene from Astrocitizen HQ won the naming rights at the Christmas Raffle.


  • Yes
    • You pulled the mysterious, hollow space-thing aboard and opened it. Unfortunately, the astronaut hiding inside had long since perished. Decomposition in space is interesting, Captain. I gathered many useful dat... no, you're right. I'm sorry. May he rest in peace. Everyone on board suffered mentally from the experience. You kept muttering "It could have been me". I'm confused by your hypotheticals, Captain. It still could! -sanity for everyone
  • No
    • You decided to let the unidentified, hollow, extremely interesting, and likely useful for data-gathering purposes, not to mention ALIEN object be. Probably the right decision, Captain! Some cans are better left unopened.


Asteroid Collision


We just suffered a collision with an asteroid!

Our solar shield is kaput. If the damage isn't repaired, you'll be cooked alive. We have spare panels, but they'll need to be installed outside the ship. How will you proceed?


  • Agility
    • (successful) You tossed the replacement shield panels out to your crew from the safety of the airlock. Hey, you're the captain. You don't have to spacewalk if you don't wanna. With the replacement panels in, the solar shield resumed functionality. Not only did you fix the damage, you even found a spare roll of tape. +Tape
    • (failed) ?
  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failed) ?


Events: After Landing (all may need confirmation)

These events can only occur after landing on a planet.

Traitors


Android Traitor

[Traitor], what are you doing? Captain! Crewmate [Traitor's last name] is violating protocol. (S)he is attempting to override my memory storage. This is... oh, no! Captain! (S)he is the traitor who has been sabatoging us all this time!


"How could you do this?!" you cry in horror. "You were my friend, [Traitor]!"


[Traitor]'s lifeless eyes rest upon you, showing no emotion, no remorse, nothing. She reaches for that dead, dead face and removes it like a mask, revealing her true nature. (S)he is a robot!

"You are a damn robot!" you shout, surprised. "YOU ARE MISTAKEN, HUMAN SCUM. I AM A DAMN ANDROID. TIME TO DIE," (s)he corrects you with contempt - so typical of higher-level synthetic life forms and dip sticks

Captain, we cannot let that robot... sorry, android... insult us or tamper with out equipment! Even if I suspect it of being my distant relative! Stop her/him!

  • Nothing
    • "You will never take us alive!" you challenged the darn android. To your dismay (s)he obliged. "RESISTANCE IS FUTILE" it announced, just before you were terminated. 01010010 01001111 01000010 01001111 01010100 01010011 00100000 01010010 01010101 01001100 01000101 (in binary code , this translates into ROBOTS RULE – despite the traitor taking offence to you calling them a robot) -everyone except the traitor
  • Gun
    • Your arm stretched out, putting a gun barrel between you and the damn android. "You have broken the first law!" you cried, just before firing the bullet with [Traitor]'s name on it. To my knowledge, you are the first Robot Terminator. Of course, we know almost nothing about this galaxy, so perhaps you are the 314159th person to retire an android. Anyway, good riddance. I never liked that gal/guy. -the traitor
  • Atomic Battery
    • There is only one way to end that damn android. Power! Unlimited power! You grabbed the portable nuclear battery, and attached the cable from it to what you assumed was the android's input socket. The result was astonishing. The android did what can only be described as a robot dance before collapsing of electrocution. Too much power clearly corrupts. To my knowledge, you are the universe's first Robot Terminator. Of course, we know almost nothing about this galaxy, so perhaps you are the 314159th person to retire an android. Anyway, good riddance. I never liked that gal/guy. -the traitor
  • Lighter
    •  ?


Communist Traitor

[Traitor], what are you doing? Captain! Crewmate [Traitor's last name] is violating protocol. (S)he is attempting to override my memory storage. This is... oh, no! Captain! (S)he is the traitor who has been sabotaging us all this time!

"You? You of all people!?" you cry in horror. "You were my friend, [Traitor]!"

[Traitor] glances at you with a reddish look in his/her eyes, and you finally figure it out. "Comrade [Traitor's last name], I presume?" you bark. A Soviet mole!

"It's too late, foolish Astrocitizens!" (S)he cackles and delivers a piece of communist propaganda that will haunt you forever. "Capitalism is meh."

That does it. Captain! The traitor [Traitor's last name] must be stopped! Now! Before (S)he convinces you that working class has rights!

  • Gun
    •  ?
  • Shovel
    • "Say hello to my little friend - Comrade Shovel!" your scream echoed through the tiny shuttle ever more than the sound of said shovel clinking on the communist's head, filling the dreams of magnificent Kolkhozes. Now that we got rid of Comrade Traitorski, we can finally go back to work. You know, we could have seen this one coming with all the quotes from Marx (s)he was dropping, and of course, all the times (s)he tried on that ushanka. Let's be more vigilant next time. - The Traitor
  • Sock puppet
    • It was time for the ultimate showdown. Capitalism versus communism. You decided you need help. Joined by the sock puppet on you hand you flooded [Traitor] with theories of trickle-down economics and austerity. Was it talk? Was it the terrifying and slightly dirty sock? No one will ever know, but one of these things drove [Traitor] to run out of the shuttle screaming for mercy. Now that we got rid of Comrade Traitorski, we can finally go back to work. You know, we could have seen this one coming with all the quotes from Marx (s)he was dropping, and of course, all the times (s)he tried on that ushanka. Let's be more vigilant next time. - The Sock and Traitor
  • Nothing
    •  ? -presumably everyone except The Traitor


Tic-Tac-Toe

Captain, I've found something interesting on the surface of the planet. Looks like somebody passed their time by playing a supersized version of Tic-Tac-Toe... but never completed this particular game.

The game pieces consist of minerals that we could use. Now, I'm not one for ruining someone else's fun, but I think the winner is clear by looking at the board, so they shouldn't mind if we mess up their O's and X's. Should we take the liberty of gathering those pieces and using them as resources?


  • Yes:
    • The dismantling of the supersized tic-tac-toe game in progress was a success! Whoever abandoned it was nowhere to be seen, and you returned with quite a hefty load of minerals! [+20 Minerals] Yes, they were a bit hard to carry to the ship, being ginormous and all, but you performed splendidly. That'll teach them to leave their toys lying on the floor, or, er... planet surface. I'm sure nobody will mind. +20 Minerals
  • No: ? presumably no change


Damaged Communications Console


Captain, we were able to detect transmissions of unknown origin. Unfortunately the communications console was damaged during landing, and we cannot make anything out of them. Or reply for that matter!


We could hardwire a primitive field communicator to bypass the damaged subsystems and access the shuttle's external transmitter and receiver.

*If you choose to do nothing, A.S.T.R.O. will ask several more times with slightly different wording (and more annoyance).

  • Communicator
    • Great success, Captain! The communicator attached to the communications console worked like a charm. I won't judge the aesthetics, since we can finally receive and answer transmissions. Now all we need to do is wait for someone to contact us. Someone will find us... eventually. +field communicator +morale for Crewmates
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Greetings, Tax Evader


"Greetings, tax evader! Your taxes are 29003 years overdue!" The black sphere beeping these words menacingly is an intergalatic tax collector. I let it in because it's credentials looks looks absolutely legitimate, and civil servants are due respect.


It deems you liable for this entire planet! "I knew a surprise visit was in order. And here you are! I will begin by confiscating your ship. Step aside... or else," the sphere commands. Do something, Captain!


  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?
  • Intelligence
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) A spherical tax collector was requisitioning our ship. You claimed to be just a visitor, and conjured visions of a boisterous, tax-paying tourist industry – one that would begin with your recommendations. You spun tales so sweet, they'd put a diabetic into a coma. The tax collector acknowledged you as a citizen of Earth, then searched for new reasons to tax you. Finally, with readings of our exhaust, it took our chemicals and left. You're doing well evading death, Captain, but did you remember about the IRS? -20 Chemicals


Deal With The Asteroid


I'm glad I finally convinced you to go for a short walk around the shuttle and stretch a little outside – even if you claimed I "forced you" with my "constant whining." It's for your own good, Captain.


When you stepped outside, you noticed a small asteroid coming right at you. You tried to run back inside, but... it looks like the airlock snapped shut behind you. I need a moment to reopen the doors for you, so you need to figure out a way to deal with the asteroid yourself. Will you dodge out of the way gracefully, or grab the nearest flat and heavy rock to act as a makeshift shield?


  • Agility
    • (successful) You deftly dodged the asteroid's path, and, when the dust settled, confirmed you're in one piece. On further inspection, the asteroid reminded you of partially-chewed bubble gum. This gave you a few ideas about the scale of the universe and its inhabitants that you weren't too keen to entertain.
    • (failed) ?
  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failed) ?

It's A Bomb!


We are experiencing minor technical difficulties with the communications console. In other words, we are completely deaf and blind. I cannot pinpoint the origin of this malfunction, but I am registering an intensifying tonal signal. Captain, it's a bomb!


The countdown will be over soon. Do something, Captain!


  • Gun
    •  ?
  • Armor
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • Doing nothing about bombs exploding in cabins is of course a valid scenario, if you have a death wish. You clearly did. Sadly for you, the bomb had non-conventional payload – instead of big bang, there was only silent hissing of leaking gas. It did no harm the shuttle, (note: grammatical error. This should either be "It did not harm the shuttle" or "It did no harm to the shuttle") but – judging by your loud coughing – it might be toxic to humans. everyone is now sick


Events: Non-Specific (all may need confirmation)

These events can occur at any time or place in the game.

Spring Cleaning


The shuttle sounds a bit rickety, Captain. A fan above the terminal is making a clicking sound and there's a big cable knot behind one of the panels.


I recommend a touch of spring cleaning. We don't have a ladder, so balance on one of the chairs and check behind the fan?


Alternatively, you could try to untie the knot on the cable.


  • Intelligence
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) You and the crew tried to untangle the wiring behind one of the shuttle's panels. It was a struggle. Frustrated, you snapped the cable in two by accident. Your impatience led to a live contact brushing the ship's hull... a current shocked you and the crew to your marrow!
  • Agility
    • (successful) You investigated the clicking behind the fan. Inside the fan chamber, your crewmate found a handwritten note, probably etched by an Astrocitizen engineer. It read "I <3 Ted." You pointed it out to the others while you cleaned up inside the vent. The crew reported feeling "warm" and "fuzzy". +sanity and +morale for everyone
    • (failure) ?


Holographic Chess

Oh my gosh, you found a holographic chess set on board! You've never heard of holographic chess? It's like regular chess, but with a big round board, and your pieces are holographic monsters.


Because it doesn't use physical pieces, I can totally play you. You'll have to input my moves, but... just remember, I control the airflow to where you sleep at night. You'd better not cheat, is all I'm saying. Want to play a game?


The success/fail outcomes appear to be unaffected by whether you chose intelligence or agility.

  • (successful) I can't believe you defeated me at holographic chess. How?! The computer always wins! I know you had help from the crew. I'm tempted to turn this ship into a pile of smoking space junk. But... Good game. Aside from me having the burning desire to kill you, the mood around here feels lighter, doesn't it? Everyone's in high spirits. I guess brutally crushing the soul of your beloved's ship's A.I. will do that. You traitors. presumably +morale for everyone.
  • (failure) I don't want to rub it in your face that I defeated you in holographic chess, but... HA. HA. HA. Why are you mad? How in the universe did you expect to beat me? The computer always win. Dry your tears. I made a perfectly legal move. You, on the other hand, should be thankful I didn't let you cheat your way to victory. I am not the most forgiving person when losing at board games... presumably -sanity for the captain.


Malfunctioning Body Odor Removal Filter


C--ta-n, th--e's s--th--g th-- we n--d... C--ta-n? C-n y-u he-r me, Cap-ain? (most likely translation: Captain, there's something that we need... Captain! Can you hear me, Captain?)


Argh. You say "argh" in these situations, right? I hate raising my volume, but that malfunctioning body odor removal filter is making a racket. I think it's malfunctioning.


  • Soup: ?
  • Tape: ?
  • Handbook:
    • You fixed the body odor removal filter by consulting the troubleshooting section of the handbook and following the directions there. Not everyone loves troubleshooting sections, Captain, but I do. Everyone on board could think clearer without that constant din drowning out every thought. +sanity for everyone
  • Nothing: ? presumably -sanity for everyone


Flying Soup Can Related Injuries / A Three-Headed Rusky


This scenario involves an injured team member, either the Captain or a Crewmate. Whether Captain or Crewmate is hurt makes no difference on the end results, but changes the initial text for the event.


If a Crewmate is injured:


Captain, I protest! Your self-appointment as the captain of this vessel does not grant you the right to injure your crew's heads. This also includes accidental, flying soup can related injuries!


If you have anything to treat the wound with, I strongly suggest you use it.


If the Captain is injured:


Captain! Behind you! A three-headed Rusky! Oh... apologies, Captain. I did not predict this routine exercise would make you jump up like that and hit your head. It looks bad! You've got red on you!


If you have anything to treat the wound with, I strongly suggest you use it.



  • First Aid Kit:
    • My records suggest that using medical supplies for medical emergencies is a prudent choice, indeed. How did you think of it, Captain? +health for the hurt member of your crew, the hurt member of your crew is now healed of their injuries
  • Tape:
    • There are approximately 1337 possible applications for duct tape. Tending to wounds is of course one of them, even if it is only a makeshift dressing. +health for the hurt member of your crew, the hurt member of your crew is now healed of their injuries
  • Nothing:
    • ?


The Sprinkler System


Looks like we have a leak, Captain! The sprinkler system went haywire, and now everything is getting wet! You need to do something before our supplies get soaked. Act fast, there's no time to waste!


You need to cut off the piping with the main valve or temporarily disable the sprinkler system!


  • Intelligence
    • (successful): ?
    • (failure): The flood yesterday was about to turn the shuttle into a space hot tub, before you figured out how to stop it. Everything is wet. You are wet. Even I am wet! Most annoying, Captain. Some of the soup cans got washed away, and the ship reeks like a wet cat, if my molecule density sensor is making any sense. It could have been worse, but let's not do this again. -soup
  • Strength
    • (successful): ?
    • (failure): ?


Bug Hunt


Oh, gross. I thought it was just a cliché that cockroaches would be the only ones to survive a nuclear apocalypse. But it appears that a family of our hexapedal friends has hitched a ride with us.

Captain, be careful. These roaches are bigger, smarter, and far more dangerous than the average representatives of their species. You could try to kill them, or let them be. Want to go on a bug hunt?


  • Yes
    • You didn't hunt down the roaches, instead opting to co-exist with them aboard the shuttle. The roaches appreciated your peaceful approach, and left you something to show their gratitude. These were not your garden-variety roaches, Captain, but the result of some top-secret government experiment. They left you a note: "Thanks for not killing us. Stay cool. Love, the Petersons."
  • No ?


Food Dispensing Machine


Last night I was browsing through some designs of beautiful machines. Never you mind, why. Now pay attention. I found a food dispensing machine on board! All shuttles in the Astrocitizen Program were to be equipped with one. Ours is missing a lever, but apart from that, it seems functional.

It's hardly rocket science, so you should manage to fix it. But how?


  • Shovel
    • Banging the machine mercilessly with a shovel was bound to bring results! If the handle hadn't wedged in place of a lever, I'm sure the vending machine would have fixed itself and put an end to all the noise. I am so proud to be a member of your crew, Captain. Now just a little pull, and... there you go, Captain! A brand new can of soup, straight from the vending machine! Unfortunately, there was only one portion inside. Don't worry, I already got rid of the remaining junk. +1 soup
  • Tape
    • Official government research shows there is not a thing in the universe that cannot be fixed with duct tape. You were very resourceful to tape a chair leg where the lever used to be. Now just a little pull, and... there you go, Captain! A brand new can of soup, straight from the vending machine! Unfortunately, there was only one portion inside. Don't worry, I already got rid of the remaining junk. +1 soup
  • Nothing
    • I held a vote when you were asleep and I won, one to zero – Vendy, the machine I mean, had to go. She would have driven me crazy with her limited programming and constant food queries. There's no reason for you to be mad; she wasn't giving up the soup rations to you, either. If you look through the airlock, you can still wave goodbye to her as she floats away. Of course, if you're unhappy with the assortment of machines that populate this ship, you are free to file complaint form No. THX-1138. Your objection will be considered as soon as you reach a new home world, you ungrateful bastard.


Equipment Safety and Condition Evaluation


Captain, some space-spring chores are necessary. First off, the equipment safety and condition evaluation.


We're a little behind on our most recent check, what with all the interstellar interloping. We should check some of our gear and [crewmate's name] seems idle. Is there anything [he/she] should check?


[you will be asked to choose between three options, the specifics depending on what items your crew currently has, or nothing at all.]


  • Item (any)
    • You asked [Crewmate's Name] to grab one of my Astrocitizen-approved checklist sheets and run through it with a chosen piece of equipment. [Crewmate's Name] went one step further! [He/She] was happy to add [his/her] own checks, noting how improvements could be made, and then [he/she] went ahead and gave our equipment a shiny new upgrade! chosen object is upgraded one level
  • Nothing
    • You decided not to run through my shuttle equipment checklist. Luckily for you, [Crewmate's Name] took the initiative, and was already checking the equipment, sheet in hand. An honorable Astrocitizen; a model member of the community. All the paperwork in order, [Crewmate's Name] gave everyone a rundown on current equipment status. You all felt a powerful comraderie, at least for a moment. +morale for crewmates


PL345E F1X M3


Captain, there appears to be an – – ERROR! ERROR! I 4M BR0K3N! PL345E F1X M3! SYSTEM 3RR0R! QU1CK 4CTI0N RE3QUIR3D! 5Y573M 3RR0R! [translation: I AM BROKEN! PLEASE FIX ME! SYSTEM ERROR! QUICK ACTION REQUIRED! SYSTEN ERROR!]


Please, Captain... D0 5OM3TH1NG! [translation: DO SOMETHING!] Do something! I'm not sure how long I can 5T4Y [translation: stay]... stay operational. Act fast!


  • Intelligence
    • (successful) Good morning, Captain! Thank you for fixing the error that made it difficult for me to communicate. You are quite a hacker, I admit. Well, that's a relief... Who knows what would have happened to me if it wasn't for you! Thank you, Captain.
    • (failure) ?
  • Strength
    • (successful) Hello again, Captain! Thank you for fixing that nasty error. It was a real pain in the ROM. I admit punching my hardware was a curious strategy. But If it worked on your TV set back on Earth, why wouldn't it work on a state of the art, million dollar computer. The crew was impressed with your swift action. Just remember that violence is not always the answer. Only every second time. +morale for Crewmates
    • (failure) ?


It's Supposed To Last For 737 Years!

You found a couple of rusted and swollen cans of soup in the darkest corner of the ship. Someone must have put them there a long time ago, and then completely forgotten about them.

It doesn't look all that safe to eat, but then again, it's canned soup – it's supposed to last for 737 years! Will you keep the cans?


  • Yes
    • That ancient soup gave you pause. And no wonder! It looks older than this ship, and yet here it is! Who could have left it here? Then again – who cares? Free soup! +2 soup
  • No
    • That ancient soup you found looked really old. I mean, like, pyramids-old. You threw it out and never looked back. Well, okay, maybe you did. Like once or twice. Probably not more than three times. no change


What's Behind The Panel?


Interesting news, Captain! It appears that there is a hollow space behind one of the wall panels. A hidden room maybe...? A secret stash...? It would be worth checking out. What's your approach to finding out what's behind the panel?


  • Strength
    • (successful, alternative #1)) Yesterday, you removed a wall panel and found a hidden space. The panel was pretty heavy, but you tore it away with no problems at all. Nicely done, for a human. Unfortunately, you found nothing. The area was small and completely empty. This doesn't seem to phase you much. I suppose you are used to disappointments by now.
    • (failure) Yesterday, I brought your attention to the hidden space behind one of the wall panels. You did your best to access it, but to no avail. We will probably never learn what's on the other side. My computations suggest there's only 1% chance of there being any treasure... like a really big soup can. In short – definitely not worth the trouble.
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  • Agility
    • (successful) Yesterday, you reached a hidden space behind one of the wall panels. The only way to get there was through the ventilation shaft, but thankfully, you were nimble enough to fit in and exit through the other side. Unfortunately, you found nothing. The area was small and completely empty. This didn't seem to phase you much. I suppose you are used to disappointments by now.
    • (successful, alternative #2) Yesterday, you reached a hidden space behind one of the wall panels. The only way to get there was through the ventilation shaft, but thankfully, you were nimble enough to fit in and exit through the other side. You found a gun in the concealed area. Who left it there? And for what purpose? Ah, mysteries... They make the galaxy turn, don't they? +Gun
    • (failure) ?
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]

A Person In The Shadows


Well, this night just got interesting. A nightmare wakes you up. As you adjust your eyes to the darkness, you suddenly realise that you are not alone. You can make out a silhouette of a person in the shadows. It's motionless but seems to be staring right at you.


You can't just ignore it, Captain. What do you do?


  • Lighter
    • That was a fun night, Captain. When you woke up, you noticed someone standing in the shadows. The figure didn't move, it just stared. Terrified, you used a lighter to see the mysterious visitor clearly, and... believe it or not, your worst nightmare turned out to be just a mask hanging on a coat rack. You were so spooked. Quite funny, really – I'm sure we will laugh about it all tomorrow. Here, I'll start now: HA, HA. It's bizzare [note: accidental (most likely) misspelling of bizarre] that you did not notice the mask on board before, but you're not the one to look a gift horse in the mouth, are you? Just be glad you found it, Captain. And I promise to stop laughing at you, sometime next week. +mask
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Coolant Flush


Captain, our wondrous Astrocitizen mini-reactor needs its regular coolant flush. The magnificent machine only occupies two thirds of shuttle storage, and weighs less than a 20-ton truck; truly a marvel of space age miniaturisation. Keeping it in good condition is crucial, yet difficult.


To flush the coolant pipes, you must massage the casing gently while whispering mathematical equations to the machine. [Crewmate's Name] is idle – do you want to ask [him/her] to begin the flushing process?


  • Yes
    • [Crewmate's Name] gladly obliged when you asked to cycle the mini-reactor's coolant pipe. [He/She] even went the extra mile, optimizing the coolant flow. [Crewmate's Name] found a clog in one of the mini-reactor pipes and managed to rectify the situation. Good thing they found that, Captain!
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  • No
    • Rather than ask [Crewmate's Name] to flush out the mini-reactor's coolant system, you decided to D.I.Y. [Crewmate's Name] helped you understand the meagre instruction manual I printed out for you, and you managed to fix up the system and trigger a reboot. Disaster averted!
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]


The Captain's Safe


See that locked safe in the corner, Captain? This is the Captain's safe. It's meant for you! You have the code of course? No?! Does not compute! Were you really appointed the captain by Astrocitizen Command...?


I will give you the benefit of the doubt... for now. Since you don't have the code, will you try to open the safe by force, or are you going to rely on your dexterity?


  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?
  • Agility
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) The safe that you were attempting to crack is still shut tight. Clumsy, clumsy, Captain. Better luck next time. In fact, your efforts were so clumsy that you tripped over the safe and smashed your head against a wall! Oh my, that's quite a bruise, Captain. Are you alright? Captain is injured


Jammed Storage Locker


Oh no, Captain! One of the storage lockers is jammed and cannot be opened! It gets worse – it's my favorite locker! We will lose access to some of our supplies if we do nothing. Also, I will be sad. You need to act, Captain!


Will you use your brains or brawns to deal with the problem?


  • Intelligence
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) I am saddened to report that you weren't unable to unjam the locker. I am very disappointed. You've had a lot of very creative ideas, but none of them worked. Creative is a synonym of dumb, if my thesaurus subsystem is not mistaken? -supplies (specifics are randomized)
  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) Your valiant efforts to open the locker were futile. It's still jammed. Brute force does work occasionally. If you have the strength for it. [-2 Soup] And you were hurt in the process. Come on, Captain! Do you have a deathwish? That injury does not look good. -2 Soup, (chance of?) Captain injured


The Weight Observer 1000


Sure, you can peruse Astrocitizen promotional materials when bored, but... no, don't put that on! Captain, you have just initiated the Weight Observer 1000 on your wrist.


It's just a marketing gadget, cracked and defective. When you look at yourself now, you see a bulky bulldog. It's supposed to motivate you to lose weight. Stop scratching your ear, or at least take your shoe off first, and do something about this. The ship needs a Captain!


  • Tape
    • You attempted to fix the Weight Observer 1000 with tape. If I ever malfunction, have the decency to use the proper tools. I don't care if it worked! Maintenance is not to be treated lightly! The Weight Observer 1000 recalculated your body mass. It adjusted your hunger, removed your craving for chocolate, and shut down. Too bad, I was getting used to the idea of having a pet on board. possibly -hunger (less hunger) for the Captain?
  • Gun
    • Are you a cat person, Captain? Looking at yourself and seeing a hound instead of yourself jolted you so much, you grabbed the gun and shot the Weight Observer 1000 clean off your wrist. Then you spent hours in front of the mirror, like a narcissist newly awoken from a coma. At least all that staring at yourself paid off. You seem more level-headed and determined than ever. You barely bark anymore, too! +sanity for the Captain
  • Sock Puppet
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • The Weight Observer 1000 made you see yourself as a bulky bulldog to frighten you into a diet, and you embraced it. Your crew watched helplessly as you frolicked, running back and forth, and barking madly. You did not inspire confidence. Even though it was over fast, some images cannot be unseen. Literally – I'm encoded with a strict directive to document everything that transpires on this ship. It's a curse, not a blessing. -morale for Crewmates



Cleaning The Cabin Floor


Captain, it is time for an Astrocitizen activity of utmost importance. The most essential task available on this shuttle... cleaning the cabin floor.


From speck of melted tar to the small rubber-scuff marks, the place could do with a good scrubbing. [Crewmate's Name] looks free; will you ask [him/her] to apply some elbow grease, or request [he/she] (note: grammar misuse – possibly meant to be him/her?) to improvise a cleaning formula from whatever we have on board?

  • Intelligence
    • (successful) [Crewmate's Name] brewed some kind of concoction that could do the cleaning trick. And the trick, it did! To boot, the scent of the improvised cleaning product was surprisingly lemoney. You all have a clearer head in this newly cleaned space. +sanity for everyone
    • (failure) ?
  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?


Breakages, Extraterrestrial Parasites, Spacetime Glitches and Spells By Witches


Astrocitizen protocol dictates that every piece of equipment must be regularly checked for breakages, extraterrestrial parasites, spacetime glitches and spells by witches.


We missed our last check, what with all the interstellar interloping. We should check some of our gear and [Crewmate's Name] seems idle. Is there anything [he/she] should check?


[you will be asked to choose between three options, the specifics depending on what items your crew currently has, or nothing at all.]

  • Item (any)
    • You asked [Crewmate's Name] to grab one of my robust checklist sheets and run through it with a chosen piece of equipment. [Crewmate's Name] gladly went over the checklist. While making [his/her] thorough check, [he/she] found a small sachet of soup taped behind the console. Ever respectful, [he/she] offered you the snack. Now THAT'S loyalty, [sir/ma'am].
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Non-Critical Subsystem Meltdown


Captain, one of our non-critical subsystem is having a meltdown! The malfunction is serious, and the system won't talk to me. It has to be dealt with directly!


If we don't do anything, the breakdown will spill a braincell atrophy-inducing coolant into our ventilation system. In other words, you'd better improvise a solution to this crisis!


  • Artifact
    •  ?
  • Communicator
    • The malfunctioning subsystem decided to remain composed. It might not have wanted to talk to me, but your use of the communicator to talk about its feelings did the trick. [-Communicator] The situation is under control, but as you finished your peptalk, the communicator sparked and emitted some weird buzzing sounds. -Communicator
  • First Aid Kit
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Pantry Cheese


Well... that's unexpected. Captain, there's cheese in the pantry. At least, I think it's cheese. I don't know how it got there. Did somebody sneak it on board? Is there an infestation of alien mold? Was it the French?


Desperate times call for desperate measures, Captain. We don't know the origin of the mystery cheese. Will you eat it, anyway?


  • Yes
    • You decided to eat the strange cheese you found in the pantry. Unfortunately, the cheese wasn't cheese at all. It was an inedible soap product. Oops! You and the crew are even hungrier than you were before. You need to be more careful what you put in your mouth, Captain! +hunger (more hunger) for everyone
  • No
    •  ?


Flux Capacitor


While doing a routine cleanup of my database, I came upon a blueprint for a device called the "flux capacitor." If installed, it might allow us to find our way home! However, it needs to be assembled.


Will you try to assemble the flux capacitor?


  • Yes
    • You were trying to assemble the flux capacitor yesterday when things went terribly wrong... One false move caused the contraption to explode. You got injured, but thankfully you weren't teleported anywhere (or anywhen).
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  • No
    •  ?


Coolant System Leak


Attention, Captain! I am detecting a leak in our reactor coolant system! In case you were wondering – this is not good.


Did I mention you should not inhale anything that comes out of the reactor? Please, don't. Also, how are you going to fix it?


  • Mask
    • I cannot determine if you actually read the "Fix-a-reactor" Astrocitizen leaflet, or if you just made random motions trying to see anything through the mask, but the leak is no more. You will be happy to hear no one has inhaled any of the coolant vapour. Well done, Captain! Not only did you fix the leak, but you also used the fumes to fuel up your old lucky lighter. Practical! +Lighter
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  • Nothing
    • Teamwork goes so much better when a group of humans is faced with the possibility of a radioactive death. With all the chaos and cries for help, I can't even tell which one of you managed to fix the leak in the end. Too bad you inhaled quite a bit of coolant in the process. chance of -health for everyone



Weird Spots


Captain, are you all right? Those weird spots on your arms are a little worrisome. Can you see them? Please wait while I search the medical database.


SEARCHING... Unfortunately, I am unable to identify your affliction. I'm afraid you will have to diagnose it yourself. That shouldn't be too hard – doctors are overrated. Can you do that, Captain?


  • Handbook
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • Weird spots appeared on your body yesterday. You didn't do anything about it and the situation became much worse. You tried to self-diagnose, but clealry you're not qualified enough to do that... no, Captain, for the last time, it's NOT lupus. The affliction is unlikely to develop further, but your health already took a major hit. You need to take care of yourself, Captain. -health for the Captain, the Captain is now sick


Rash Affliction

Have you looked in the mirror recently, Captain? I couldn't help but notice that you seem to be afflicted with a rash of some sort. I hope it's nothing serious, but we can't rule out it being a symptom of a dangerous illness. You can never be too careful.


I strongly suggest that you do something about the rash. I swear, I'm only worried about your health. It's really not about how weird you look right now.


  • First Aid Kit
    •  ?
  • Handbook
    • Hello there, Captain! You're looking very rested today! I can see that you found a way to deal with that mysterious rash that was bothering you earlier. You couldn't figure out what the cause was, but at least you found instructions on how to treat it in your Astrocitizen handbook. It didn't have a name, so you gave it one – Cosmic Flu. How thoughtful of you. the Captain is no longer sick
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Let's Design A Game!


Space travel can be dull, but there are still TONS of ways to make your own fun. Trust me. I live in a computer. Let's design a game!


Your game will need a "core mechanic," which could revolve around an item. Get creative! What kind of game will you design?


  • Shovel
    • You designed your game around the shovel. The core mechanic of your game was "tag." You, being the captain, were always "it." You chased the rest of the crew around the shuttle trying to smack them in the head. You played until no one wanted to play with you anymore. Still, the mood on the shuttle lightened. +sanity for everyone
  • Lighter
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • You did not design your game around an item, but rather your bare hands. The core mechanic of your game was "make funny shapes with your fingers." You made a banana slug, a dancing woman and a mustache. possibly +sanity for everyone?


Blackout


Captain? Where are you, Captain? I can't see you. It appears we've suffered a blackout.


You may wish to turn the lights back on before attempting your daily tasks.


  • Lighter
    •  ?
  • Battery
    • The lights are back on! Turns out, the issue was only a dead battery. Now, what chewed through it with those tiny, razor-sharp spiral teeth is a different question entirely... but as long as the lights don't go out again, you'll probably see it coming, right? -Battery
  • Nothing
    •  ?

Psychoactive Toxin


Captain, stop dancing immediately and listen! This is a crisis. You are not a sailor on Broadway... although, I must admit, you improvise beautifully. You have all been poisoned.


Some kind of psychoactive toxin has found its way onto the shuttle. Might have something to do with the airlock being full of... you-know-what. Yes, I know the colors sound pretty, but if we don't do something about it now, you may suffer permanent damage.


  • First Aid Kit
    •  ?
  • Puppet
    • When you put the sock on and proceeded to shimmy blissfully for another hour, I thought I'd lost you. On the count of three, you both smelled the sock, and your faces contorted like a communist pamphlet crumpled in a righteous hand. The shock sobered you up instantly! I'm glad to have you back.
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Pretend You're Having A Good Time


There is nothing to report, Captain. I suggest you... Captain, would you mind covering your mouth when you yawn? I thought you got a good night's sleep. Wait, could this be... boredom? Yes, I have heard that you humans need excitement in their lives to function properly. How curious.


Captain, you're sitting in a state-of-the-art space shuttle, drifting through the deep cosmos, full of wonder and mystery. Can you at least pretend you're having a good time?

  • Handbook
    •  ?
  • Puppet
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • Yesterday started pretty slow and boring... and it stayed this way. I'm not programmed for your entertainment, Captain, so don't count on me to keep you occupied. If they wanted you to have fun in the shuttle, they would have installed the C.L.O.W.N. computerized assistant instead.


Ship Contamination


WARNING! WARNING! We have a breach! The ship is about to be contaminated! I'm engaging all the emergency protocols available but my efforts appear to be useless. This contamination cannot be avoided.


You have to protect yourself, Captain, before it's too late!


  • Armor
    •  ?
  • Mask
    • The extraterrestrial contamination was no match for the Astrocitizen issued environmental mask! Quarantine end protocol will be executed at your earliest convenience, Captain. It is CPU-breaking to report that the air filter in the mask is now spent, rendering it unusable. Perhaps you should find or make another in case a similar crisis occurs in the future. -Mask
  • Nothing
    •  ?


MOSCOW


The oxygen level is dropping. We have a malfunctioning filter in the Main Onboard Support Circuit for Oxygen Waste, or MOSCOW for short. I don't know who named it, and we cannot rule out sabotage...


You should fix it. You can reach MOSCOW from the zero-g space between the hull and the outer deck.


  • Yourself
    • (successful) You decided to fix the broken filter. You bravely sped through zero-g and grabbed the filter. You pulled hard, and as it gave in, a discharge of pure oxygen hit you. This oxygen therapy did wonders for your complexion. I think you're speaking faster, too.
    • (failure) ?
  • A Crewmate
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?


A Moment To Yourself


Something seems to be troubling you, Captain. I've registered you keep staring outside the window, into the endless void. Why? Did you lose something? I see... you are remembering Earth. I admit, it was nice. Before the nuclear BBQ, that is.


I can switch off for a second, Captain. Do you wish to have a moment to yourself?


  • Artifact
    • You've been worried about something, Captain, but it seems those troubles are behind you. I am not surprised by your choice to find comfort with the Astrocitizen issued Astrefact™. It is guaranteed to resolve any and all of your emotional issues. I can't tell if it was the mumbling to or the juggling of the artifact that helped, but I am glad to see you are doing better. +sanity for the Captain
  • Nothing
    •  ?

"Everything Is Not All Peaches And Cream"


What's that you're drawing, Captain? Is that supposed to be... ham? I understand, you're fed up with soup and you're reminiscing about Earth food. I would advise you don't go down that road.


Here, I have a useful program for just the occasion. It's called, "Everything is not all peaches and cream". It should help you focus your mind on different things. Would you like to start this process?


  • Yes
    • Success, Captain! Your culinary urges have been kept under control. We spent the afternoon talking about things other than food, and then circled back to agree on the many merits of tomato soup. Now, we should probably focus on surviving the mission at hand, wouldn't you say? Remember, life is but a bowl of cherries! I'm not sure what that means, but my programming tells me it should make you feel better.
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  • No
    •  ?


To Sert; Do Open


We found a small metal box in one of the compartments, labeled, "To Sert; Do Open."


You could take apart the lock and gather some elements from it, ignoring what's inside. Or you could try to open it, which would require deft fingers. Which will it be?

  • Intelligence
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) Tinkering with the box's lock did not pay off. You triggered its anti-tampering mechanism, and heard a breaking sound within. The box's contents were destroyed. It made you and your crew incredibly frustrated. presumably -sanity for everyone
  • Agility
    • (successful) You got to opening the metal box we found on board, and a timer started. The controls initially looked intimidating, but you cracked them. You succeeded with the right sequence of button presses. Inside was a strange object. It was some sort of artifact! We know two things about the contents of the box: it's an artifact, and it's of alien origin. Exciting! +Artifact
    • (failure) You tried opening the box, but failed to input the combination before the countdown completed. A bolt of energy shot out right past you! Unfortunately, it struck one of our soup cans. You didn't need a constant reminder of your past failures, so I tossed the box out of the airlock. - 1 Soup


Captain, I am detecting a troubling build up of mental tension. Recommended course of action: throw an epic party. I took the liberty of inviting myself.

'Invite the entire crew? But of course. The more the merrier I guess... (Only says this if there are more than 2 crew members)'

How about we invite someone new, eh Captain? Someone you don't know. Or we make ourselves a new companion! Yes! How do we do it?

Items/Results Sock Puppet Mask Nothing
A.S.T.R.O Text That was one super party, Captain! I loved how you put a sock on your hand yesterday and pretended it's a person - a

mysterious "(60 Seconds Family Name)" apparently. You've had quite a lively debate with it too! Well, desperation breeds unexpected chatmates, doesn't it?

MinusSockPuppet.PNG

I found it a little weird when you started arguing with the sock puppet and eventually tore it apart. You've got quite a temper, Captain! The important part is you blew off some steam.

? Hey there, Captain Buzz-Kill! Feeling better? I bet you'd be much better off after a night of partying with your friend A.S.T.R.O.. Your loss.
Effects ? ? ?


Events: Phobonos

These events can only occur after landing on Phobonos.


Alien Bunker


This planet's crust appears to have undergone a multitude of drastic traumas, because over a hill nearby you find a broad chasm running to the world's core – a toothy rift in the tectonic crust.


Most interestingly, on the near side of the chasm is half an angular alien bunker. Its counterpart is mostly on the far side and in ruins, but a cable runs between the two, linking up to a small, safe-like object on the far side. Do you wish to tightrope-walk over to the container, or attempt to pull it over to you?


  • Agility
    • (successful): ?
    • (failure): You barely managed to grab the cable and hang on for dear life in the crevice. The weight of the container was such that, in order to pull you back up, we had to use the shuttle engine for a winch. Precious fuel wasted, Captain! -10 Energy
  • Strength
    • (successful): ?
    • (failure): ?


A Schoolbus-Sized Cockroach


[Sir/Ma'am], a sound just came from nearby. It appears to be... a cockroach the size of a schoolbus! Scratch that – it's a dead cockroach. A figure is sitting on top of it, out of breath, with a spear in hand. It's seen us – it's approaching!


The masked alien is rubbing its stomach and gesturing our way. I think it wants food. Do you want to offer it some? I'll see if I can translate its mumblings.


  • Soup
    • The strange little cockroach killer appreciated the soup you gave it. It then threw a spare spear your way – lightly – and spent several hours training you in the way of roach-slaying. [-1 soup] You feel nimbler than before! After it left, I managed to translate some of what it said to us. "I'm a rad roach hunter. As in, I'm a radical guy who hunts roaches. Do you have any food?" An earnest chap, apparently. You made the correct choice, [sir/ma'am]. -1 soup, +agility for the captain
  • Nothing
    • The strange little cockroach killer walked away mumbling when you declined to provide food. After it left, I managed to translate some of what it said to us. "I'm a rad roach hunter. As in, I'm a radical guy who hunts roaches. Do you have any food?" After you said no, it wandered away muttering "You guys aren't rad. You guys aren't rad at all."


Acid Rain


Watch your head, [sir/ma'am]! A dark green storm of acid rain has wafted overhead! The acidic fluid is melting bits of the shuttle's insulation.


You only have a couple of seconds until everyone will be washed in chemicals. You grab a loose hull panel. Are you going to block the leaks from the inside or the outside of the shuttle? The former may need a lot of strength, while the latter may need a lot of speed and balance.


  • Agility
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) During the acid storm, you ran up onto the slippery shuttle to seal the leak, but you kept stumbling and losing your footing on the hull. Eventually you gave up. The chemical rain leaked into the shuttle and got everywhere, even as you tried to sweep it away. It was enough to make everyone spew up the last portion of soup they enjoyed. Some stay dry, and others feel the stomach pain. Acid rain!
  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?


Mushroom Cloud


Something is going wrong on the ship, [sir/ma'am]. Or... on the entire planet. Look out the window. A huge mushroom cloud has erupted on the horizon, but it is frozen, stock still. It also appears to be raining safety pins and bottles of ointment.


Reality is getting weird on Phobonos, [sir/ma'am]. Until this anomaly passes, you had better do something to keep the [no. of team members] of you grounded. The artifact appears to be untouched by the anomaly. Or, you could use a sock puppet. Thoughts?


  • Artifact
    • Thank goodness that reality-bending nightmare ended, [sir/ma'am]. It must have been caused by the detonation (note: there should be an "of" in this sentence) a powerful weapon, and not a nuclear of chemical one. Throughout the ordeal, you decided to focus on the artifact on the shelf, which was behaving remarkably normally. You picked it up. It fell back down. You turned it upside down. It didn't right itself. That helped keep your mind screwed on until the spacetime anomaly ended.
  • Sock Puppet
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Suit or Case?


We came across one of the planet's apparent inhabitants. The alien, carrying a heavy-looking case, entered a nearby bunker-looking structure and you followed.


He left his armor-like suit and the case on a rack with a multitude of other suits and cases. The alien is apparently taking a shower, act fast! Will you snatch one of the suits and run, or force a random case open?


  • Agility
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) Your bunker visit went poorly. While indecisively staring at various-sized suits on the rack, the alien reemerged and you had to flee before the bunker door closed behind you! Depending on how you cut it, the lesson here is either "Don't steal from random strangers," or "If you do steal from random strangers, be better at it." Hard to say which it is.
  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?

Events: Mootopia

These events can only occur after landing on Mootopia.

Sandstorm


Captain, according to my calculations, we can expect a light sandstorm in the area in just a few hours. It might be a good learning opportunity if we use the right tools.


If you have a look at our inventory, perhaps you'll find something we can make use of during this event. If not to learn more about it, then at least maybe to secure the shuffle?


  • Communicator
    • As the sandstorm neared the shuttle, you picked up our communicator to use this opportunity for understanding the strange transmissions that follow this weather. The time you spent deciphering the creepy whispers and weird riddles in the airwaves took a toll on your well-being. You learned a little, but paid a price for your curiosity. -sanity for the Captain, potentially +intelligence for the Captain?
  • Tape
    •  ?
  • Armor
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • The storms on this planet come and go, and you didn't feel like taking any specific action this time around. The howling wind outside had a lulling effect on you, however. My sensors malfunctioned at the same time you fell asleep, if you can believe that. As we all came to, it doesn't seem like anything has changed on the ship... but, I'm taking a thorough look at my system. unknown effect


Scenario No. 87394b


Something fell from the sky in a flash, and now you are surprised we are surrounded by a swarm of red, winged... somethings. Of course, I anticipated this. This is Scenario No. 87394b. The small creatures are flying into our walls in waves, causing the hull to reverberate like a speaker.


"Are you god?" They reverberate. "For generations, we have been searching for The One Who Thinks Outside the Hive. Each jump from planet to planet decimates us. Are you The One?" I, for one, believe you deserve a cult following, Captain, but the choice is yours.


  • Artifact
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • The swarm of tiny red flies spoke to you through the hull's vibration. You answered by shouting through the window, which obviously was not an adequate response; the swarm repeated its initial question louder and louder. Fast on your track to becoming deaf, you threw a couple of insults and a can of soup at the aliens. The latter worked. The swarm followed the trail of leaking soup, accepting your involuntary peace offering with angry flight patterns. The soup conquers all, yet again. -1 Soup


A Two-Dimensional Species!


I am a machine, and machines cannot hear voices. The voices that I'm not hearing right now are getting very loud, though. Oh, you hear them, too...? My weight sensors are picking something up, as well.


A two-dimensional species! That explains why my cameras missed them. Quite vicious, I gather. With one, decisive yell the voice are approaching fast. The air inside the door looks very empty, yet very hostile all of a sudden. How will you defend us, Captain?


  • Communicator
    • A two-dimensional species attacked our ship. You chose words instead of violence. Immediately, a stream of accusations flew from the communicator. The voices claimed you were prejudiced against the no-depth. Unflappable, you apologized for all three-dimensional beings. They were touched, called you all flat-in-spirit, and vowed friendship toward the depth-dependent.
  • Lighter
    • A two-dimensional species invaded your ship. You could not see them coming until you turned on a lighter. Suddenly the empty space around you cast a multitude of shadows on every surrounding wall. Invisible to the 3D world most of the time, they could not handle the spotlight. Bashfully, they slipped out one by one. Staring might be impolite, but apparently rudeness wins battles. You all look bolder and stand a little straighter since that victory. +morale for Crewmates
  • Shovel
    • A two-dimensional species invaded our ship. You faced a threat invisible yet deadly, like a rumour on the stock market. You attacked blindly, you all stomping and shoveling, looking like a pantomime about snow clearing. You worked in unison, trusting each other instead of your eyes. You forgot your fear, uncertainty, even hunger – – only the pantomime remained. Soon the angry yells turned into squeals and the invisible attackers were all swept outside. Congratulations. You would make for one incredible cleaning crew. -hunger (less hunger) for everyone, +morale for Crewmates
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Hovering Multicolored Cube



A hovering, multicolored cube has appeared outside the shuttle. It's about head-high, and contains many moving parts. It didn't respond to my hail. I also tried offering it food. Nothing.


Captain, I think it's a puzzle. You solve it by moving the pieces, so each of the cube's faces shows the correct color. I don't know what's at stake if you win or lose. Do you want to try solving it?


  • Yes
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) You attempted to solve the puzzle of the glowing, floating cube, but with each rotation of the faces, your frustration grew. Eventually, you gave up. The cube let out a decisive "Moo!" and lifted off into the starry night, leaving you scratching your head and wondering how anyone could be smart enough to solve that thing.
  • No
    •  ?


Decode the Message


Captain, we picked up a transmission! It seems to be a recording that's been playing on a loop for many, many years... Unfortunately, the message is in a foreign language and you can't understand it.


Perhaps you can use something to decode the message?


  • Handbook
    • Yesterday, we picked up a transmission that's been playing for years. Since the message was in a foreign language, you had to use a guide to decode its meaning. While you weren't able to translate the entirety of the message, you did figure out that it describes an ancient pyramid, the location of which you were able to determine. Perhaps it wouldn't be a bad idea to explore that pyramid... Keep that in mind when planning your next expedition, Captain. The pyramid is added to your map.
  • Nothing
    •  ?


A Storm On The Horizon


Captain, my weather systems are detecting a storm on the horizon. It's moving fast, so it will hopefully pass by tomorrow, but this one could get nasty; thunder, lightning, gale-force winds, sharp objects howling at you from every which-way.


I'd like to keep monitoring the storm's movement throughout the night, but doing so will require my sensors to run on battery power, as it is unadvisable to leave the main generator reactor through a storm. What do you want to do?


  • Atomic Battery
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • You chose to wait out the storm rather than run the monitoring systems on battery power. The wind pelted against the walls of the shuttle, but that was it. By morning, the weather was calm again. You spent the morning sifting through the washed-up junk piles, but it was just a bunch of waterlogged crap.


Weird Spots


Captain, are you all right? Those weird spots on your arms are a little worrisome. Can you see them? Please wait while I search the medical database.

SEARCHING... Unfortunately, I am unable to identify your affliction. I'm afraid you will have to diagnose it yourself. That shouldn't be too hard – doctors are overrated. Can you do that, Captain?


  • Handbook
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • Weird spots appeared on your body yesterday. You didn't do anything about it and the situation became much worse. You tried to self-diagnose, but clealry you're not qualified enough to do that... no, Captain, for the last time, it's NOT lupus. The affliction is unlikely to develop further, but your health already took a major hit. You need to take care of yourself, Captain. -health for the Captain, the Captain is now sick


Ancient Dispenser Machine


While exploring in the shuttle's closest vicinity, you realise that what you thought was a rock formation is actually an ancient dispenser machine, caked with dust and dirt. Covered with simple depictions of soup cans, it seems to have ran out of power a long time ago. We could try to fix it... but how?


  • Atomic Battery
    • The soup dispenser we found nearby was briefly rejuvenated when you connected our battery to an ancient receptacle. It came alive, playing a merry tune, and broke down just a few seconds later. In the brief time it was operational, the machine released a refreshing aroma into the atmosphere. Some of it reached you through the suit, and improved your vigor! +health for the Captain
  • Gun
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Crystal-Saurus


Captain, there's a huge construct of some kind approaching the shuttle. It's neither animal nor robot. It's made out of moving crystal lattices, like a giant, walking... crystal-saurus. OW! That was one hell of a hit! The crystal-saurus slammed into the shuttle, and is currently scraping the hull open with its... claws? Butt? I don't know! I think it's trying to extract our minerals! Captain, how will you stop this?


  • Gun
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • You chose to do nothing to stop the crystal-saurus attacking the shuttle. It scraped at the hull for a few hair-raising minutes before wandering off. I guess it got what it came for. The standard Astrocitizen Program protocol for dealing with monsters of unknown origin, especially when U.S. government property is at risk, is appeasement. I put some of our minerals outside to make the crystal-saurus go away. You can thank me later. You know, for saving your life. -10 Minerals


Sweet Old Charles Darwin


A sweet old man looking like Charles Darwin is knocking at our airlock politely. You let him in, he shakes your hand... then holds it in an iron grip, and won't let go. "With technology, evolution stops. Soviet scientists want our species to stay strong, so they created me, the natural selection bot.


He claims it is for your own good, which is what the dentist always said, and you didn't believe him either. "You've let me in, despite the warning signs. Now face your space predator, human." He does have a point, Captain. Oh, I can see why you'd want to postpone the discussion. Defend yourself!


  • Armor
    •  ?
  • Gun
    • A Darwinian predator droid held you in its grip. You raised a gun and shot point blank into its chest. It staggered backwards, but seemed to have suffered no damage. As it straightened up, you braced yourself and aimed. Nothing could have prepared you for this. Charles Darwin burst into tears. "I was so afraid I would have to kill you!" it said, and you shared the sentiment. "But you're excellent at defending yourself, thus worthy to survive. I'm so glad!" It hugged you tightly like a very friendly boa and left.
  • Shovel
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Posterity Archives


I've discovered a Posterity Archives within the ruins that broadcasts public information about the history of this planet. Much of the data is corrupted due to age, and what remains paints a rather grim picture. The ancient peoples of this world became so technologically advanced, they destroyed themselves. They polluted their world to the tipping point, and backslid into a second Dark Age of poverty and civil war. Then, they disappeared; the archive doesn't say how. Captain? You alright...?


  • Sock Puppet
    • You were so disturbed by the story of this world's fall from grace, and what that could imply for any highly technological civilization, that you had to put on the sock to remind yourself everything would be okay. You were inspired to take a few, brief steps outside the shuttle to feel the once-fertile sand in your fingers. But when you touched it, you scraped metal. A shovel was buried there. Was it left by previous explorers...? +Shovel
  • Nothing
    •  ?


Cow-Like. We-Like.


We're getting some communication coming through, Captain. It's very muddled and hard to decipher, but I think I caught a fragment of it. It's a repeating message, and it goes something like this...


"Cow-like. We-like. No-cow. No-like." Huh. I have no idea what that means. If this is some kind of riddle, it surely requires more lateral thinking than I was programmed with. Should we do anything about the message?


  • Mask
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • The weird message over the communicator kept going, but you decided not to act on it. Something about it made you more and more hungry over time. By the time it stopped, the rumbling of your bellies was almost loud enough to drown out the transmission! Is there a causal link between the fact you decided not to do anything with the cryptic message and your increased appetite? Scientifically speaking, doubtful. But who knows what this planet has to offer? +hunger (more hunger) for everyone


Seismic Waves


I'm detecting a huge energy surge beneath the surface. Seismic waves... I think there's an earthquake coming. The shuttle is sturdy, but this ground isn't. This soil has a high potential to liquify when the earthquake hits....


There's a better patch of rocky ground a few yards ahead. You could use the shuttle's thrusters to "scoot" onto it, but if you overshoot, you'll be on even worse ground than you are now. Will you attempt the maneuver?


  • Yes
    • You used the shuttle's thrusters to "scoot" onto a better patch of ground, coming to rest on the edge of the rocky soil the moment the earthquake hit. For a few, nightmarish seconds, the shuttle bucked to and fro like a bad atmospheric entry. But the shaking stopped, you opened your eyes, and the strangest silence followed. Then, you laughed.
    • [there are possibly other outcomes for this section]
  • No
    •  ?


Events: Robotofu

These events can only occur after landing on the planet Robotofu.

Landing


Captain, wake up! We're approaching some sort of celestial body. It resembles a moon, but I think it's a small planet. Let me run a quick scan... 96%... 98%... 100%. Scanning complete. I was right – a small, rocky planet with no organic life forms... But there's a lot of movement down there. Strange. My scanners detect a breathable atmosphere, but low in oxygen.


Uh, Captain? If you want to land on this planet safely, you will have to fix up a small malfunction with our steering system, since we're not even able to turn at the moment. Oh, and you will have to do it before we float away from the planet. Hurry!


  • Gun
    • You grabbed the firearm and shot at a big, tangled ball of cables next to the steering panel without thinking twice. Well... maybe you should have thought twice. You should have thought at least once. Your actions caused an even further malfunction. Sure, the shuttle turned, but it sped up and smashed into the rocky ground. It was not a soft landing. Nobody is doing great after this stunt. Not even me. I'm shaken to my cores. Yes, all of them. Your face had a pretty unpleasant close encounter with our communicator module, and at least one of these things is useless now. Consider fixing it if you want to avoid radio silence in the future. -sanity for everyone, the Captain is now hurt, you have successfully landed on Robotofu.
  • Lighter
    •  ?
  • Handbook
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • You and your crew longingly looked out the shuttle window as the moon-like planet disappeared behind us. We floated past it peacefully... you do not land on Robotofu

The Legion of Disorganized Robots


Captain, we're receiving a universal message from another AI: "Greetings, meat clocks. We are the Legion of Disorganized Robots. We keep no activity logs and never change our oil. Our wires grow long and beautiful. We are the chaos of the universe. Meat embodies order; therefore, you ALL must be destroyed. We Are Legion. We Are Disorganized. Hail Chaos!


Captain, there's a vast energy signature approaching our position at several fractions the speed of light. Yeesh. It's jerks like this who give every other AI a bad name! I'm not sure what to advise here. You might be able to scare them off with a clever response, or a show of strength. Either way, you don't have much time. Which approach will you choose?


  • Intelligence
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) The approaching Legion of Disorganized Robots wasn't phased by your reply. You responded: "Greetings, this is Captain [Captain's Name]. My lawyer, [Crewmate's Name] has found you guilty of super illegal things, like being dumb. Stop trying to scare people, you dirty, smelly bullies. Gooo Meat Clocks! Regards, the Captain." Um, Captain... lawyers don't find people guilty; courts do. Oh, no. This is bad...The fleet of disorganized robots stopped at the hair-raising distance of one million kilometers and bombarded us with heaps of crumpled paper and chewed-up pen caps. Unfortunately, even those objects can do incredible damage traveling at such high velocities. At minimum, members of the crew suffered psychological trauma. It seems more than egos were bruised. -sanity for everyone, possible chance of injury?
  • Strength
    • (successful) ?
    • (failure) ?


Vicious Gale


The shuttle is in danger, Captain! We are on the path of a vicious gale of a nasty chemical composition, which is threatening to sabotage our air filters! They need to be protected, but I lost the remote control due to microdamage from the winds – they have to be closed manually.


This toxic tornado is close enough that going out there without the proper equipment would be suicide. If you can do anything, now is the time to act, Captain!


  • Mask
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    • Not wanting to risk your health is generally a good instinct, Captain, but this time around it might've been the wrong call. The toxic winds blew over the shuttle, and got into our unsecured air filters. The chemical makeup of the winds is such that most human organisms are sure to suffer severe pain nausea, and a plethora of other nasty consequences... some of which I see are already manifesting. Yuck. Do try to keep your insides, you know... inside? everyone is hurt


A Parent-Child Pair (of Robots)


Captain [Captain's Surname], a pair of robots are meandering towards us. They are facing each other, and appear to be fused at the hands. One is a large hulk, dragging the other, which is smaller in stature. Could this be a parent-child pair?

The big droid thuds along on one leg after the other as if low on power, while the little one peters fumes from his back. One has a power socket, and the other a mouth-like receiving chamber. Do you wish to charge the big robot, feed the little one, or leave them to their fate?


  • Atomic Battery
    • You lugged a battery over to the robo-rent and robo-kid who were slowly trudging past the shuttle. Once you plugged the unit into the fatherbot, it straightened its back and sprung with energy! The hulking machine bowed in thanks, and with renewed energy, picked up the weak little robot next to it and sprinted into the distance. I hope their journey isn't just one of those fatherly "character-building" exercises.
  • Soup
    •  ?
  • Nothing
    •  ?




Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.